290th Date: She Told Him to Open Up… Then Used It Against Him!

[00:00:00] Speaker A: As difficult as it is for us as men to. I hate using the word. I hate using hot button words. But be vulnerable or whatever, but just to open up to somebody, it's difficult because we don't want you to then take it and turn it on us. It's difficult for us to open up. It's difficult for us to ask y' all for help because the first thing you gonna say is, you wasn't saying that shit when I was paying your bill. Like, [00:00:20] Speaker B: there's nothing she can do to ever come back from that. He has to forgive her, and I don't think he probably ever will, because even if he got a better job and made more money, he just going to throw it back in her face. So this. [00:00:42] Speaker A: And welcome back to relationship status. It's your boy Yousef in the building, and I'm here with [00:00:46] Speaker C: Chanel. [00:00:47] Speaker A: And we are back once again because we got two of the best. One of the most controversial people in the pd, My guy Vic. What's happening, Vic? [00:00:55] Speaker B: What's up, bro? I appreciate it, man. [00:00:57] Speaker A: Been trying to get Vic on the show for forever, but he be dodging me. He don't take my calls like that all the time. I had to call his manager, and then his manager had to call their manager, and that's how I was able to get him on the show. And then the next one, my girl Lakeisha, all the way from the metro. Hey, Keisha. She's [00:01:12] Speaker C: a dog. [00:01:13] Speaker A: You just did your first episode the other day. Is that what I saw in front of the mic? You had something in front using the mic? You had a backdrop. [00:01:20] Speaker C: Well, you know, I've been doing it for a little minute, so I just started, like, my own little thing. [00:01:27] Speaker A: Okay. [00:01:28] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:01:28] Speaker A: You enjoyed it? You use it? [00:01:30] Speaker C: Yeah, I do. [00:01:30] Speaker A: Okay, that's good. [00:01:31] Speaker C: You know, I get a little hate from the women, but it's okay. [00:01:34] Speaker A: Yeah, that's what it's supposed to be. Everybody's supposed to hate women, all right? We like to be with them. We just hate them. All right, so first question we going to go with. I ain't [00:01:43] Speaker C: even going to mess with [00:01:44] Speaker A: you. Shut up. So first thing we going to ask you all, we ask all our guests this. So first up, if you feel comfortable answering the question, Vic, what's your relationship status? [00:01:53] Speaker B: I am in a healthy relationship. [00:01:55] Speaker A: Yes, I know. You had her make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on. On. [00:01:59] Speaker D: I saw that. [00:02:01] Speaker A: He said, now do this. Now, that's a challenge. It's a challenge. And then [00:02:04] Speaker C: the peanut butter. I [00:02:06] Speaker D: promise y' all Bit that sandwich, too. You ain't about to had a hole in [00:02:10] Speaker C: it. Peanut butter and jelly as well. [00:02:12] Speaker A: Yeah. Then she made it, and then he bit. She said, watch out. Yeah. So that's cool. You guys are cool. Keisha, what about you? [00:02:18] Speaker C: I am very much single, baby. Who is out there, y'? All? Is anybody else out there single, baby? I'm looking for a man. I need one, and I want one so bad. [00:02:24] Speaker D: All [00:02:25] Speaker A: what we like to do, we like to hook people up on here. So if you. If you want to hit Keisha up, go ahead and email us at the Crew Relationship Status podcast dot com. The Crew Relationship Status podcast dot com. Speaking of things we need you to do, we're on. We're trying to get to 500 by December 1st subscribers on YouTube. So make sure that you go ahead and subscribe. Go to Relationship Status Podcast on YouTube. Subscribe and then on the very latest video, you'll see a question in the chat. Go ahead and answer the chat. That puts you in the running for a 100 gift card as well as a Relationship Status Podcast T shirt. You know, everybody needs to give a gas card. You know, Angel. Angel done commented, like, 10 [00:03:01] Speaker C: times. [00:03:04] Speaker A: Yeah. To. To. We got. We're gonna do a drawing, but they got a comment and all of that. And then we're gonna give out a gas. [00:03:09] Speaker C: Hey, hey. My family. Anybody out there that know me, put the thing in and get the gas car and give it to me. [00:03:18] Speaker A: Okay, cool. Definitely. However it happens, we just need to get to 500 by December 1. But no matter what, whether we get to 500 or not, on December 1, we are going to do the drawing live. So please tap in then on our Facebook. So we came up with a topic. It's actually by our guest, Keisha, and she said that you asked the man to unpack his feelings and then went through his emotional suitcase looking for something to throw at him. Like, is that a. Like, why do I like Chanel this? Chanel? Why do y' all do that? [00:03:51] Speaker D: I don't do that. [00:03:53] Speaker A: Okay. What are you doing? [00:03:54] Speaker C: Are you sure? [00:03:55] Speaker D: I don't do that. [00:03:58] Speaker A: We're consistently [00:03:59] Speaker D: hard things. Unless you throw things at me first. [00:04:01] Speaker A: No, but, I mean, men are consistently. I'm a [00:04:03] Speaker D: very [00:04:03] Speaker A: visual [00:04:04] Speaker D: person. But seriously, I honestly do believe that when people do that, it's because they're backed against the wall. And sometimes you don't have anything. You don't have a rebuttal. So sometimes you feel like you have to have a comeback. I don't see any other reason for Someone to. If you share something with me, especially if it's an insecurity or a fear, and I'm going to use that at a vulnerable time. I mean, that's a red flag for me to throw something up in your face that you share with me that you wanted to, especially something emotional or something that you normally wouldn't share. That's a red flag to do that. I wouldn't do that. But I'm not gonna say I haven't done that. I wouldn't do that unless it was a situation where I was back in the corner and I felt like you came for me first. Right. Cause I ain't gonna lie. I done did some mess now. Don't look at me like that. [00:04:51] Speaker C: You know what I'm saying? [00:04:52] Speaker B: I'm just saying, what's wrong with conceding to an argument sometimes? I ain't [00:04:55] Speaker D: that person all the time. [00:04:57] Speaker B: What I'm saying is sometimes it's okay to say, you right. Hey, you got it. [00:05:02] Speaker D: Yeah. And it takes growth. And I can say that I'm growing, but I haven't always. I haven't always been [00:05:08] Speaker C: there. Okay, you're right. You got it. Do that mean, like, they just brushing the conversation? Because [00:05:13] Speaker D: some people can do it and be sarcastic about it. [00:05:16] Speaker C: Like, real like, okay, yeah, I feel you. I feel where you coming from. I need to know, like, [00:05:20] Speaker A: listen, for me, I just want it over with. I want to go to sleep. I got to do tomorrow. And a woman is going to hound you [00:05:31] Speaker D: until [00:05:31] Speaker A: you say she right. [00:05:33] Speaker D: I can make sometimes what men do, especially them light skins, [00:05:38] Speaker B: a bunch of them, three of them. Is [00:05:39] Speaker D: y' all like. Y' all, like, dream, [00:05:41] Speaker A: y' [00:05:41] Speaker D: all like this. You a light, bright. You a clap on. But I'm [00:05:45] Speaker A: darker than you. [00:05:46] Speaker D: That don't mean nothing. Do you gonna clap? Huh? That's my dog. You gonna leave me aching, [00:05:51] Speaker A: but I'm watching these people. But [00:05:53] Speaker D: the point is, y', all, like, I'm gonna tell you, you can agree with this. We can't stand for a man to sit here and you vent, you say whatever you got to say. And the moment we get to talk, now you don't want to hear it. If I can sit here and be patient enough to hear your grievance, for you to say what it is that you have a problem with. Sometimes it depends. And I want to have a discussion. It ain't fair for you to shut me down when it's my turn to speak. [00:06:14] Speaker C: Sometimes it do depends on how you come in. Like how a woman is coming off with the conversation. Right? [00:06:20] Speaker D: I agree with [00:06:21] Speaker C: that. Because men, they gonna normally shut down because they not typically they don't they not used to being heard. Right. [00:06:29] Speaker D: You [00:06:29] Speaker C: know what I'm saying? I [00:06:30] Speaker D: can agree with [00:06:30] Speaker C: that. If you talking, if a man, if a woman is talking to a, to a man and she going crazy or just saying something that to make his insecurity just drop down right Then how else he's supposed to respond? [00:06:45] Speaker D: And that's true too. Because if you bruise someone ego, especially men, when you bruise someone ego, you can't expect for somebody to come back to you. But [00:06:52] Speaker B: if you stay in the confines of the argument, it should never go that far. [00:06:55] Speaker D: That's true too. [00:06:56] Speaker B: If we sitting here talking about me leaving dishes in the sink, leave it to that. Don't talk about [00:07:02] Speaker A: the trash. The [00:07:03] Speaker B: trash. We're talking about the dishes. [00:07:05] Speaker D: And again, like I said in the past, the only way, like I said, I'm going to be transparent. The only way I have ever gone to something or took a low blow is if I've been attacked first. But I do agree that if we're going to argue about this particular situation, let's stay on that situation. But if we going to talk about cleanliness and you want to talk about the fact that I cheated last week, we can't jump. We can't [00:07:29] Speaker A: jump. No, but kick the [00:07:31] Speaker D: argument, bro. [00:07:32] Speaker C: Yeah, [00:07:34] Speaker A: but if you, but if you cheated last week, I should issue, we should be talking about [00:07:38] Speaker D: me cheating last week. [00:07:40] Speaker A: Still be on my [00:07:40] Speaker D: mind [00:07:41] Speaker C: talking [00:07:41] Speaker D: about it last week. [00:07:42] Speaker A: We did talk about it last week. [00:07:45] Speaker C: Bring it up again. [00:07:46] Speaker D: Y' all say we do that as women where we don't let shit go. No, no, [00:07:50] Speaker A: but y' all do that. [00:07:51] Speaker D: Well, you [00:07:52] Speaker C: can't bring it up again [00:07:54] Speaker B: on a level to that. [00:07:56] Speaker A: You can't [00:07:56] Speaker C: bring it up again now. You [00:07:58] Speaker D: can't bring it back [00:07:58] Speaker C: up now if we, if we going on with, with one subject, just like you said, we [00:08:03] Speaker D: talk about trash. Talk about the trash. [00:08:04] Speaker C: We going to talk about the dishes. Or if you want to talk about the trash, we'll talk about trash. No, now it ain't, oh, why you ain't wash these dishes? Oh, then she come back and say, oh, well, you ain't took the trash out. So [00:08:15] Speaker D: now it's back and forth. [00:08:16] Speaker A: Oh, no, you cheated last week. Yeah, that's escalation. That's escalation. [00:08:21] Speaker D: No, no, no. [00:08:23] Speaker A: I'm over [00:08:23] Speaker D: here hanging my sister. [00:08:25] Speaker A: Are [00:08:25] Speaker D: you mad cuz I came in at one? Are you mad C came in at one? Or you think I was with that. Which one is. Wait a minute. Conversation. Are we mad about the time I came in? You can't do that. [00:08:37] Speaker A: Why was you coming in at 1 o'? [00:08:38] Speaker B: Clock? The losses change flat. [00:08:42] Speaker A: Yeah, [00:08:42] Speaker B: I done cancel you on my phone playing. What is wrong with you? [00:08:45] Speaker D: That's why I say you a fire sign. That's what going to happen. [00:08:49] Speaker A: Y' [00:08:49] Speaker C: all can't do that now. You can't do that. [00:08:52] Speaker B: Yeah, [00:08:52] Speaker A: all right. [00:08:52] Speaker C: Yeah. No, you see, [00:08:53] Speaker D: y' all going to be mean. They think [00:08:55] Speaker B: in the hospital. You need to bring your ass home. [00:08:57] Speaker D: Excuse me. I'm not in the hospital. [00:08:58] Speaker B: Excuse me. [00:08:59] Speaker A: Yeah, that's [00:09:00] Speaker B: visiting. I was over at 10. [00:09:01] Speaker D: Hey, you better be here by 10. [00:09:03] Speaker B: 1507. [00:09:04] Speaker D: I gave a 1507. [00:09:08] Speaker A: But as difficult as it is for us as men to. I hate using the word. I hate using hot button words. But be vulnerable or whatever. But just to open up to somebody, it's difficult because we don't want you to then take it and turn it on us. It's difficult for us to open up. It's difficult for us to ask y' all for help because the first thing you're going to say is, you weren't saying that when I was paying your bill. Like, they don't give me no money [00:09:31] Speaker D: like that, though. But [00:09:32] Speaker C: I don't understand why y' all think it all women. No, [00:09:35] Speaker A: no, no. That's. That's. I'm not saying all I'm saying, I would say it's a majority. [00:09:40] Speaker C: You know, that's what I talk about on my platform, and that's what I get most of the time. Is it like the men always say? Oh, yeah, all the women like that. All the women do. Well, no, all the women do [00:09:49] Speaker A: that. I'm not using the absolute. I'm not using the absolute term in that sense because I understand. It's not all women. What I can say. It's most women. And it's a lot of women that I've dealt with. So I can speak in my circumference. And it's a lot of women that a lot of men have dealt with. Maybe [00:10:05] Speaker D: you're. [00:10:06] Speaker A: Nope, that's not it. Because don't think about this, because we talked about this before. Chanel. [00:10:09] Speaker D: Picker. [00:10:10] Speaker A: No, [00:10:10] Speaker D: you thought I said pickle. Go ahead. I said picker. [00:10:17] Speaker A: I'm not starting with you today. [00:10:18] Speaker C: Meaning his picker. [00:10:20] Speaker A: What would [00:10:20] Speaker D: you scar? [00:10:21] Speaker A: But here's what I'm saying. Like, just like we was talking about Chanel a couple of weeks. A couple episodes ago, we was like, that if man don't know how to cut the grass or whatever. Remember we talked about it? If you don't cut the grass, but you gotta call your daddy to cut the grass. Yes. That's not a good look for him. It's [00:10:37] Speaker D: not. [00:10:38] Speaker A: And so just the same as if you helping me, it's not a good look for me to take help from you. So it takes everything in me to allow you to help me. Because as a man, I should be able to take care of myself. I should be able to take care of things that's in this house. I should not have to ask you for help or I should not require you for help. So why then would you turn around? Because some women, a lot of women do this. They do the stuff, especially out of. Oh, I'm just. I know I gotta help you out, baby. You know, you, I got your back. And as soon as we have an argument. Broke ass nigga. [00:11:10] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:11:11] Speaker A: You know what I'm saying? Like, that's the, [00:11:13] Speaker D: that's the first one. That's not all women. And I, I mean, I, I, [00:11:16] Speaker C: it's really not. [00:11:17] Speaker D: I apologize for the species of women that you dealt with. [00:11:21] Speaker A: No, no, you're saying, you're saying that's not all women. I literally preface my statement by saying this is not. I'm not talking about all women. I'm talking about most of the women that I have dealt with and most of the women that most men have dealt with. [00:11:32] Speaker B: So I wanna say this, y' all younger versions, is the reason why we carry the trauma. Cause when there's a man out there right now that one of y', all, both of y' all have traumatized and you just don't know it, and he's dealing with it internally at some point in time in your 20s, you did something that. [00:11:50] Speaker A: Why she said [00:11:50] Speaker B: you did something in your 20s, that probably ain't too far for you. But what I'm saying is that we've dealt with this. So now I'm 45 years old, and my girlfriend is dealing with the mess that Shaniqua put me through when I was 17, [00:12:04] Speaker D: right? [00:12:05] Speaker B: So I'm carrying this, and I don't know how to get rid of it. But a lot of us men, we deal with this. But we cannot come to you and tell you that Shaniqua did this, this and this. And you be like, what the hell? You was with Heifer? [00:12:16] Speaker C: Why you can't come to her and tell her? [00:12:18] Speaker B: I mean, because [00:12:20] Speaker C: at some point in the relationship, you should be able to come to that lady. And tell that. [00:12:23] Speaker D: Okay, but. That's the. But to address what you just said. Do you. That it's vice versa, too. That a lot of times the reason why we may put y' all through that is because of the trauma we had to go through with Craig and Dae Dae and all these other little sorry [00:12:34] Speaker C: moments. God [00:12:34] Speaker B: damn, how many of this. [00:12:35] Speaker C: I [00:12:36] Speaker D: mean, [00:12:37] Speaker C: we [00:12:37] Speaker D: were young, too. That don't mean we humped them all [00:12:39] Speaker C: that. Right? But [00:12:40] Speaker D: I'm saying, can you imagine that most girls started dating or being interested in guys at 14, 15 years old? And you get your heart broken sometimes a lot sooner than you actually lay down with a guy, [00:12:50] Speaker B: okay? [00:12:51] Speaker D: Emotionally, you get your heart broken before you get into the physical act. And you got your feelings hurt because you like him. You thought he like you too, but then you realize he was humping your friend. I mean, a lot of stuff like that happened in high school. And you done got your feelings hurt. So now when you 21 years old, you already don't trust men because you got your feelings hurt early. So now when your friend that you really getting down with, we gonna say friend because you ain't married. When you getting down with him and he start acting like this young, immature guy that you dealt with in your early years, 14, 15 years old, you automatically lash out in that way, like, oh, you probably talking to what your name is. I ain't want to say. Keisha. That's a common name. But your name is Keisha. Yeah, it [00:13:30] Speaker C: is [00:13:31] Speaker D: Quetta. You know what I'm saying? Because we have trauma, too, at an early age or we watch our daddies. Dad, I hope you ain't watching this. Cause I ain't talking about you. [00:13:39] Speaker C: Oh, girl. [00:13:40] Speaker D: But I knew this man who I have been, he always be watching, but he'll be all right. Cause he know he done did dirt, Ma. He wasn't no angel. But I'm saying, if we saw our dads not treat her. I can honestly say this. I said this before on the show. I'm a single mom of four sons. That's a hard task because I'm trying to rewrite history and break generational curses. As a mom who's trying to break generational curses in men, [00:14:02] Speaker C: that is. [00:14:02] Speaker D: But my boys have not saw. They have not saw the experience of seeing a man put me in my soft girl era. But I'm trying to teach them how to put their wives in that era. You know what I'm saying? That's hard. And [00:14:13] Speaker C: that is. [00:14:13] Speaker D: That's very hard. So can you imagine the trauma that has been placed on me by men, and I'm trying to rewrite that for my sons. Because we, as women, pour that venom into our sons because we try to make them our husbands. Cause we ain't got one [00:14:24] Speaker C: right. But you still trying to make sure. You trying to make sure. You trying to make sure your kids, your sons, put that into a woman. But [00:14:32] Speaker D: you still ain't address [00:14:33] Speaker B: the fact that you don't hurt my feelings. [00:14:35] Speaker D: But I'm trying to tell you that it's vice versa. The same way your feelings are hurt. [00:14:39] Speaker C: What do you mean? Your feelings [00:14:40] Speaker D: are hurt? When you. When, like you said, with your significant other, she has to deal with the fact that you're dealing with trauma that happened when you were 17 years old. You're met with the same thing from us. Cause we dealing with. So now we. Trauma clashing together. Because I'm dealing with old. Her. You deal with [00:14:55] Speaker C: old feelings. She got to deal with your feelings. Y' all gotta learn how to deal with feelings together. You gotta. You gotta learn how to deal with her feelings, and she gotta learn how to deal with your feelings. Now. Go [00:15:04] Speaker A: ahead, go ahead, go ahead, go ahead. Keep going. [00:15:06] Speaker C: Don't worry about it. [00:15:08] Speaker A: When it's a podcast, you're supposed to talk. [00:15:10] Speaker C: No, I'm just saying, like, typically. Cause women, when men get into their feelings and they start talking about that, women don't like to hear it. Sorry to say it. They don't like to hit. They. They double down and they just tell me, hey, you. You are soft. You are weak. This is what they say when a man. When a man come in and tell you how they feel. And when they get in their feelings. That's just what. That's just what women do. [00:15:35] Speaker A: I had a conversation this weekend, and [00:15:36] Speaker C: that's just. [00:15:36] Speaker A: I had a conversation this weekend with a friend. Yes. Matter of fact, yesterday. And she was like, I need to come on your show. I need to come on show. I said, okay, cool. She said. She tells the story. And she says this guy, she was messing, playing around with him, making it seem like she forgot his birthday. So she had the month, but she kind of did forget the day. So she was trying to, you know, crack a joke or whatever. And so she said it's 21st, 23rd, but it was actually the 23rd, but she. She was saying some other dates. And so he got mad, hung up the phone on her, blocked her, and ain't talked to her for, like two weeks. And she was trying to get to the date. So that she could plan something for him. And her point. And her point was [00:16:15] Speaker C: she knew his birthday already. [00:16:16] Speaker A: No, no, no. She didn't. She didn't. She knew. She knew the month and she knew around what day, but she was trying to plan something for his birthday. And she was like, what's up with you tender dudes? Like, why is dude so tender? I was [00:16:26] Speaker B: like, see, that's that. And that's it. Why you got to go there? That's what I'm saying. The most I' ma ever do in an argument is raise my voice. [00:16:34] Speaker C: Now, now, given the fact that he blocked her, [00:16:38] Speaker A: that's tender behavior. I must agree. That's the blocking. The blocking. [00:16:42] Speaker C: He blocked her. I [00:16:43] Speaker A: got [00:16:45] Speaker C: so tender beh. [00:16:46] Speaker A: We very rarely disagree because [00:16:47] Speaker C: she don't. She didn't remember. [00:16:49] Speaker A: She didn't remember [00:16:50] Speaker C: birthday. [00:16:51] Speaker A: Like hanging up. I'm cool with [00:16:52] Speaker C: hanging up, especially [00:16:54] Speaker D: over something like that. Cuz I'm saying that burns me. You going to block me and what. I can't stand somebody who blocked me. And then you turn around after you done miss me a little bit and then you going to unblock me and then message [00:17:02] Speaker C: me if [00:17:03] Speaker D: you don't get out my [00:17:04] Speaker C: inbox. What you doing? [00:17:06] Speaker B: Your [00:17:07] Speaker C: tender ass get. [00:17:08] Speaker B: But that's. That's her story, [00:17:11] Speaker A: right? [00:17:12] Speaker B: That's her side of the story. [00:17:13] Speaker A: Now I will give you that. That's cool. [00:17:15] Speaker B: And that's. And that's what I always don't like when somebody's telling me a situation. I'm like, well, would the other person say, yeah, that's not true. Yeah, that's not true. There's something else. There's more to it. It's more to it. No, she got blocked. But I think [00:17:30] Speaker D: it's more to what she's saying. Because [00:17:32] Speaker B: if you my. If you my peoples we messing around and we doing this and you forgot my birthday, you might have triggered something else in my mind. That, damn, my mama forgot my birthday one time. Or. And [00:17:43] Speaker D: she could have already known that and [00:17:44] Speaker C: you're playing around with the wrong conversation. But still in that moment, why block her? Why not just be like, hey, you know what? My birthday is such and such date. [00:17:53] Speaker B: Can somebody forget your birthday? [00:17:55] Speaker C: I don't give a damn. Cause I don't take our birthdays. Ain't nothing to me for real. [00:17:58] Speaker B: Okay. [00:18:01] Speaker C: I'm a Scorpio, baby. And my birthday in 12 days. I see. [00:18:04] Speaker D: I'm November 20th. I'm a Sagittarius. I will burn your shit down. Forget the 20th, burn it down. [00:18:10] Speaker B: But see, [00:18:12] Speaker C: I [00:18:12] Speaker B: will say what Is Tinder. We gonna have a main [00:18:15] Speaker D: show about the 28th. [00:18:16] Speaker B: I don't really care about my birthday. That's not a big deal. I'd rather you forget it. But I can't speak for everybody. I can't speak for everybody, but [00:18:26] Speaker C: I really get where you come from. It doesn't [00:18:27] Speaker D: matter if everybody remember. But the people who I hold dear to my heart. [00:18:30] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah, yeah, [00:18:31] Speaker C: yeah. I get what I let them [00:18:32] Speaker D: boys forget. My daddy, my brother. People who I. Who I take care of are people who I love on. If I pour that love into you and then you gonna mess around and you had 28 days of November. You know, I bought [00:18:46] Speaker C: it November. I get where you coming from. Because forget [00:18:48] Speaker D: if you [00:18:49] Speaker C: want. Forgot about his brother and his mom is someone that was, you know, he probably. Even if him and his mama had that close relationship, but he still wanted that because it's a mother's love that everybody want. You know what I'm saying? So. And if she ain't thought about his birthday, I ain't never showed up for his birthday. It's a made [00:19:05] Speaker B: up situation. [00:19:06] Speaker C: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I'm saying. But if he. If she ain't never thought about him and ain't never showed up for his birthday and then it triggered him, it'll probably. Yeah. [00:19:15] Speaker D: You know, that reminds me of, though. You know how like some kids when you're in school or whatever and y' all have that your mama joke? I'm gonna tell y' all answer that because that reminded me of that I lost my mom at 17. And, you know, normally you can joke and be like, yo mama this, your mama that. You go back and forth. And I remember this boy, my mom had just passed away. I moved to Hartsville and we was cracking and he was saying, your daddy this and talking about my hair and everything else. I was cool till he said your mama [00:19:41] Speaker B: and that was it, [00:19:41] Speaker D: Baby, the way I flip saying that to say trauma can push you to [00:19:47] Speaker C: a level [00:19:48] Speaker D: of breakdown that. And I feel what you're saying. It may not have been that deep, but she could have joked about something that he knew, she knew not to play about. [00:19:58] Speaker C: Right? [00:19:58] Speaker A: Well, I, I don't. I don't think she knew. I think they only been dealing. They only been dealing for about a year. So [00:20:05] Speaker B: she done made a birthday. [00:20:06] Speaker A: This is the first. This was kind of the first birthday crossing of it. [00:20:10] Speaker C: So they was coming up to like the first birthday maybe. [00:20:13] Speaker A: Yeah, it was coming to [00:20:13] Speaker D: the first time. But you said she was joking around like [00:20:17] Speaker A: she really was trying. She was trying to. She said what she was trying to do was do a surprise for him, but without him kind [00:20:22] Speaker D: of knowing. But [00:20:23] Speaker A: she was kind of joking. [00:20:24] Speaker B: Or just ask. Hey, [00:20:27] Speaker A: now that I agree with. And that's what I wanted to say, but I didn't say it in the moment. [00:20:31] Speaker B: Yeah, I really. I love being direct. And I tell Molada a lot. I ask her a question that's a yes or no answer, and she gonna always go around. I'm like, yes or no? It's that simple. Yes or no? [00:20:42] Speaker D: We like to explain. [00:20:44] Speaker A: Explain what that [00:20:45] Speaker C: be the problem. [00:20:46] Speaker A: Like just yes or no. [00:20:47] Speaker D: Well, I'm sorry. I'm one of the people. I'm explaining all that. [00:20:50] Speaker B: I don't want to hear about the label. Show me the baby. [00:20:52] Speaker D: Cause I don't like to be misunderstood. [00:20:54] Speaker B: Yes or no? [00:20:55] Speaker D: I don't really care about being right or wrong. Is yes [00:20:56] Speaker B: or no misunderstood? [00:20:57] Speaker D: I just don't like. But if you ask me a question, and in my mind, it's not a simple yes or no or I want to give you the reason why I'm saying no or why I'm saying y' all ain't gonna look at me like that. All three of y' all look at me like I'm crazy. I'm gonna explain. Cause y' all looking at me like, yeah, she CR. And is. But I'm still gonna explain. And I'm long winded, so I'm gonna explain exactly why. And I'm probably gonna do it two times because I wanna make sure you got my point. [00:21:25] Speaker A: Well, I need you to not be. I [00:21:27] Speaker D: am. [00:21:27] Speaker A: I need y' all to. I need y' all to not be long winded on our. On everybody's favorite segment, which is the either or questions. Please answer the questions directly. [00:21:36] Speaker B: Okay. [00:21:37] Speaker A: You have to choose one or the other. There is no strategy. [00:21:40] Speaker D: See how he be in the ass? He be directing at me. [00:21:43] Speaker A: There is no the fence. There's no strand in [00:21:46] Speaker D: the fence. [00:21:47] Speaker A: I ain't gotta be you on my show, though. [00:21:48] Speaker D: I don't care. [00:21:49] Speaker A: All right, so anyway. All right, so first question. Your partner still talks to their ex every day. Would you rather your partner still talks to the ex every day or still has intimate pictures of their ex? [00:22:03] Speaker D: See, you be asking dumb questions. That's dumb because you [00:22:05] Speaker A: ain't. I'm [00:22:06] Speaker D: a fireside. You ain't gonna do neither one. So that's why I say you be asking questions impossible for me to answer. [00:22:13] Speaker A: Your partner talking talks to their ex [00:22:15] Speaker C: every day. [00:22:16] Speaker A: Every day [00:22:16] Speaker C: or. [00:22:17] Speaker A: Or still has intimate pictures of their ex. I'm [00:22:20] Speaker B: gonna say the pictures. The [00:22:22] Speaker C: pictures. Yeah. [00:22:22] Speaker A: I'm good with the pictures. [00:22:24] Speaker C: I go to Chanel. [00:22:25] Speaker D: You can have the pictures. Because I'm gonna have some pictures too. They gonna be here. Why you just say [00:22:28] Speaker B: the pictures? [00:22:33] Speaker A: Told you. She just. All right. That's [00:22:36] Speaker D: what he be talking about. Cause he don't explain. She [00:22:38] Speaker C: already told you. Like to explain. [00:22:41] Speaker A: All right, next one. Give your partner your phone password or give them access to every conversation you've ever had. [00:22:47] Speaker B: Pass. Password? [00:22:48] Speaker D: Yeah, [00:22:49] Speaker B: Password. [00:22:50] Speaker D: I take the password. [00:22:53] Speaker C: They still gonna have access to the conversation. [00:22:56] Speaker A: I [00:22:57] Speaker D: can delete the conversations [00:22:58] Speaker A: or any conversation you've ever [00:23:00] Speaker C: had. People know how to go back and get the conversation. [00:23:03] Speaker D: You better learn how to clear out their iPhone. [00:23:06] Speaker B: See, y' all thinking. Y' all thinking small. We talking about every conversation. [00:23:09] Speaker D: Yeah. That's why I say the password. [00:23:12] Speaker A: Situations that ain't [00:23:13] Speaker D: even on your phone. [00:23:14] Speaker C: Oh, like talk to people, like on the phone and stuff. Okay. Password. [00:23:19] Speaker A: Password. [00:23:20] Speaker C: I don't have one. [00:23:22] Speaker A: Okay. Would you rather your partner likes their ex's pictures or their ex likes every picture your partner posts? [00:23:29] Speaker D: The ex like every picture they post? [00:23:31] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. I'm agree with you on that one. [00:23:33] Speaker C: Just like the pictures. I don't care. [00:23:36] Speaker D: I'd rather they do it to you. Not you do it to them. [00:23:39] Speaker A: Okay. [00:23:39] Speaker D: We control what other people do. I [00:23:41] Speaker C: might like to piss. [00:23:41] Speaker B: That is true. That's true. That's true. [00:23:43] Speaker A: All right. Would you rather find out your partner deleted messages or find out they have a secret social media account? [00:23:51] Speaker B: Ooh, [00:23:52] Speaker D: Say that [00:23:53] Speaker C: one time. [00:23:55] Speaker A: Would you rather your partner has deleted messages or find out they have a secret social media account? [00:24:01] Speaker C: Ooh. That's that. [00:24:02] Speaker D: They got a secret social media. I'll take the social media. The social media don't really mean [00:24:08] Speaker C: no. They got. They got that face. They got that secret Facebook dating app that you don't know nothing about. [00:24:13] Speaker D: Not necessarily. Necessarily. [00:24:15] Speaker C: But [00:24:15] Speaker D: if you [00:24:15] Speaker C: deleted [00:24:16] Speaker D: some stuff, I ain't [00:24:16] Speaker C: gonna [00:24:17] Speaker D: never know what that is. I'm Inspector Gadget. I'm gonna find that page. [00:24:20] Speaker B: Yo, she gonna answer some of these questions. [00:24:24] Speaker D: Listen, I [00:24:24] Speaker A: promise you [00:24:25] Speaker D: go and look at past episodes. I argue about it all the time. He'll never answer. But yeah, he argue with me all the time. [00:24:31] Speaker A: Okay, we'll double back. I would prefer. I would prefer that their partner. Their exes like [00:24:40] Speaker D: their [00:24:41] Speaker A: pictures. [00:24:41] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:43] Speaker A: I don't care about deleted messages. So I guess the deleted messages. Yeah. [00:24:47] Speaker D: You explain it too, ain't it? [00:24:48] Speaker B: I will, kid. I'm with you on the deleted messages. [00:24:49] Speaker A: Yeah, deleted messages. I don't. I don't care. Got a couple more. Couple more. Would you rather date someone who posts you constantly but flirts privately or someone who never posts you. No, [00:25:03] Speaker C: no, no, no. But [00:25:03] Speaker A: is completely faithful? [00:25:05] Speaker C: Go back to the other one who [00:25:06] Speaker D: never post me. [00:25:07] Speaker C: He ain't answered the other ones. [00:25:11] Speaker A: No, you said. You said. You said your partner. Your partner still talks to the ex every day. [00:25:14] Speaker C: No, the social media and the private messages. You ain't answer that one. [00:25:17] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:25:18] Speaker A: Oh, social media. [00:25:19] Speaker C: Oh, I [00:25:19] Speaker A: don't care about no social media, [00:25:20] Speaker B: okay? [00:25:21] Speaker A: Because I don't. I don't live on social media except for the show. So date someone who posts you constantly but flirts privately or someone who never posts you, but it's completely faithful. Someone who never [00:25:32] Speaker D: post me. A completely faithful. [00:25:34] Speaker B: Yeah, I'll take that. I'll take that. [00:25:38] Speaker A: Okay, that one. All right, now we're getting a [00:25:40] Speaker C: little. I'd rather a broke over rich, to be honest with you. Go ahead. [00:25:44] Speaker A: About to get a little complicated. All [00:25:46] Speaker C: right, it is [00:25:47] Speaker A: gonna do three more. Would you rather amazing with terrible communication or amazing communication with terrible sex? [00:25:54] Speaker D: Oh, I'm [00:25:55] Speaker B: getting old. Amazing communication. [00:26:00] Speaker C: Okay. [00:26:00] Speaker D: How old? I get. It ain't [00:26:01] Speaker A: broke. Amazing sex with terrible communication or amazing communication with terrible sex? [00:26:07] Speaker D: I'm gonna take terrible communication. I teach you how to talk, do sign language and stuff, but [00:26:12] Speaker B: you can't. [00:26:12] Speaker D: I can't be angry in all parts of my life. I'm gonna need some type of relief. [00:26:15] Speaker B: But what he's saying is the [00:26:17] Speaker C: communication is [00:26:17] Speaker B: never gonna get better. [00:26:19] Speaker A: It's never gonna get better. [00:26:20] Speaker D: Oh, well, don't talk to me. [00:26:21] Speaker B: Why? [00:26:22] Speaker C: I'm gonna take the first one, too. [00:26:24] Speaker D: Oh, well, [00:26:25] Speaker B: I'll take the bad sex. [00:26:27] Speaker A: Yeah. And [00:26:28] Speaker D: it ain't never gonna get better. [00:26:29] Speaker A: I'm more. I'm more. I'm. I'm probably more. [00:26:32] Speaker C: All y' all lives gonna be in the bathroom. All y' all out with lotion [00:26:36] Speaker B: in the bathroom. [00:26:37] Speaker D: Hand gonna be raw. What [00:26:38] Speaker B: do you mean? I got a whole house. I go in the closet. I ain't making spice the laundry room. My truck. [00:26:44] Speaker D: He gonna make different cigarettes. [00:26:46] Speaker B: I'mma spice it up [00:26:48] Speaker C: with lotion. All y' all lies. [00:26:51] Speaker A: Oh, God, [00:26:52] Speaker B: baby. All that. I'm gonna look like little commerce. One of the [00:26:55] Speaker C: rooms not blue Madison. He [00:26:57] Speaker D: gonna name all them different women. [00:27:01] Speaker C: Okay, [00:27:04] Speaker A: two more. Two more. Would you rather find out your partner faked every orgasm? [00:27:08] Speaker D: Jesus. [00:27:09] Speaker A: Or find out they think their ex was better in bed than you? [00:27:12] Speaker B: Fake it. [00:27:13] Speaker A: Fake it. [00:27:16] Speaker D: I really don't care, [00:27:18] Speaker C: but. [00:27:18] Speaker B: Well, wait a minute. How can y'. All. But honestly, is that even possible? [00:27:22] Speaker D: Well, [00:27:22] Speaker C: I'm gonna get mine anyway. No, [00:27:25] Speaker B: I'm saying for your partner to face. Is it, like, Would that do something to y'? All? To be honest with you, [00:27:32] Speaker C: probably done got mine. [00:27:33] Speaker D: I mean, y' all really can't fake it, but. I mean, we [00:27:34] Speaker B: can. But [00:27:35] Speaker A: we can. [00:27:36] Speaker C: Yeah, they [00:27:36] Speaker D: can. [00:27:37] Speaker A: Yeah, we can. [00:27:37] Speaker C: But I probably already got mine, so I don't give. I don't care. Fake it all you want. That's [00:27:41] Speaker D: your business. [00:27:42] Speaker B: Okay. [00:27:43] Speaker C: Got me. [00:27:44] Speaker B: Okay. [00:27:44] Speaker A: Yeah. I [00:27:45] Speaker B: just feel like y'. All, like a woman would probably, you know, a little bit more. [00:27:50] Speaker D: It depends on how much I love you emotionally. It might damage me if I'm really in love. [00:27:56] Speaker A: Oh, no. But [00:27:57] Speaker D: at this point, we got bad. I'm just trying to have good sex. [00:28:01] Speaker A: Sometimes they don't know. [00:28:02] Speaker B: You don't know [00:28:03] Speaker C: how [00:28:03] Speaker B: you can't. [00:28:04] Speaker A: Boy, you. That [00:28:05] Speaker C: thing is softer than a piece of bread. [00:28:09] Speaker A: Not all the time. [00:28:10] Speaker D: I ain't doing this conversation, y'. All. My daddy be watching. [00:28:15] Speaker A: Not all the time. [00:28:17] Speaker C: So it stay hard after you [00:28:18] Speaker A: come. Boy, you get, you get, you get. You get some of them nights, man. And then. [00:28:23] Speaker D: Lord Jesus, [00:28:24] Speaker C: y' all must be on that honey or something. [00:28:25] Speaker A: No, I don't put none of that stuff in my body now. Maybe some Don Julio. Maybe a little hand I [00:28:31] Speaker D: was this morning. [00:28:32] Speaker C: Well, I would think it'll get soft after you done. [00:28:36] Speaker A: Ain't none of that happening. [00:28:38] Speaker C: I learned something new. [00:28:40] Speaker A: Last one [00:28:41] Speaker C: next time. [00:28:42] Speaker A: Last one is Chanel. You know, hold on. All right. Your partner accidentally calls you their ex's name during sex or tells you afterwards that their ex does it better or did it better. [00:28:54] Speaker D: You can call me their name. We just gonna role play. [00:28:57] Speaker B: I'm going to jail [00:28:59] Speaker C: now. I'm going to jail. Is crazy. [00:29:02] Speaker D: Either way, somebody gonna get hurt. [00:29:04] Speaker A: So [00:29:05] Speaker B: what was the second one? [00:29:07] Speaker A: The first one? [00:29:07] Speaker D: After y' all get done, they tell you the ex is [00:29:09] Speaker A: better after you get done. Either [00:29:10] Speaker D: way your ego bruised, [00:29:11] Speaker A: the ex did it better. [00:29:13] Speaker C: Just [00:29:14] Speaker B: call me the name. Call me. That's [00:29:15] Speaker D: what I say. At this point, we just gonna call it role play. Yeah, [00:29:18] Speaker A: call me. We gonna be role playing tonight. Cause I'm gonna call you my ex name. [00:29:21] Speaker C: Why y' all think you feel like if. If. If somebody tell you, hey, my ex did something better than what? Why y' all think it's over? Why do it? Why you gotta tell her? Why would it hurt you so bad, though? [00:29:31] Speaker A: Why would you be. Why would it hurt me so bad. [00:29:33] Speaker D: Why would you wanna be with somebody? Why you ain't with them? [00:29:35] Speaker A: Why go. Go be with. [00:29:37] Speaker D: No, [00:29:38] Speaker C: but you done got you, didn't you? [00:29:40] Speaker B: I faked it, so, I mean, it don't matter. Not [00:29:42] Speaker C: as fake. It is crazy. [00:29:45] Speaker B: But what I'm saying is, like, why would you. [00:29:46] Speaker D: That wouldn't bother you if you with this man and you. You really into him, and he'd be like, and [00:29:51] Speaker C: I'm really into. Like, we like. [00:29:54] Speaker D: And you thought you did your big one and he was like, lisa was better than you, girl. [00:29:58] Speaker C: What you mean? Like, oh, girl, [00:30:00] Speaker D: you gonna turn into Tiffany Chucky and you gonna stab him up. I promise you, something gonna click in you when you thought you did your big one and he told you somebody else is better than [00:30:08] Speaker C: you, girlfriend, I just be like, girl, I done got me you, [00:30:13] Speaker A: Jesus. [00:30:14] Speaker D: I promise you I'm gonna be in a murderous [00:30:16] Speaker C: rage. [00:30:17] Speaker D: They ain't even gotta take my picture at the jailhouse. I'll take it myself. Gonna be in there selfieing it [00:30:20] Speaker C: up. Wait [00:30:23] Speaker B: a minute. So that means you don't really like bro, then If. If you [00:30:26] Speaker C: just try to get you. You know, it depends. I can't like them for real. May. I probably hurt tomorrow or something. But you ain't. You ain't gonna know it. Get the hell on up out of here, boy. Oh, put shit on out the door. [00:30:40] Speaker D: Oh, [00:30:42] Speaker A: yeah. On that note, that's the old segment. Thank [00:30:47] Speaker D: you. I'm just gonna tuck my tail. I. I ain't even got there yet. Or either. I lost it [00:30:53] Speaker C: now. I probably like somebody else tomorrow. [00:30:54] Speaker A: All right, if you got. If you got some either or questions, go ahead and send them into the show. Send it to Dilemmas at. I'm sorry. Send it to the crew at Relationship Status. [00:31:06] Speaker B: I'm just saying if I'm getting dressed outside, I'm burning out [00:31:09] Speaker D: everybody. Like, I ain't even gonna. I ain't got no comment. No comment. [00:31:16] Speaker C: You got to get dressed outside. You [00:31:18] Speaker B: too. Yeah. [00:31:21] Speaker A: All [00:31:21] Speaker B: that [00:31:23] Speaker C: clothes on outside. [00:31:24] Speaker A: Be like them boys outside the house at a house party. [00:31:26] Speaker B: Everybody homeless. [00:31:29] Speaker D: Oh. [00:31:30] Speaker A: All right. So thank y' all once again. And then let's get into our advice letter. If you have an advice letter, you're having an issue, a problem, go ahead and email us dilemmaslationshipstatuspodcast.com we might not give you the best advice, but we'll give you some advice. That's [email protected] so today we have a letter. It's entitled he doesn't tell Me anything anymore. Since their relationship status. My boyfriend told me he has sometimes. He sometimes feels insecure because I earn more money than he does. I reassured him, but during an argument, I said, maybe if you made more money, you wouldn't be so sensitive. I apologized, but now he barely shares anything personal. He says he's fine, but our conversations feel surface level. I told him relationships need communication. And he said, you really showed me what happens when I communicate. How do I get him to open up again? Signed. I said, sorry. Now what? [00:32:24] Speaker C: You won't. He ain't opening it up no more, baby. [00:32:30] Speaker A: So let me ask you this. What might he need before trusting her again? [00:32:34] Speaker C: He ain't. [00:32:35] Speaker D: First trust. And I. Like I said before, a bruised ego and trust is two different things. I don't think it's a trust thing. I think it's a matter of. I mean, that was a low blow. [00:32:46] Speaker A: That's not a bruised ego. That was trust. That was complete trust. [00:32:49] Speaker D: Well, somebody, [00:32:50] Speaker C: he not gonna open up to her no more. I don't feel like you a man gonna speak on it. [00:32:56] Speaker A: Well, I did ask Vic the question. He did. Oh, [00:32:58] Speaker D: I ain't heard you say Vic. That's why you say they don't listen. [00:33:01] Speaker A: I said, hey, Vic. [00:33:02] Speaker C: Oh, I didn't ask. But he stuttered [00:33:04] Speaker D: so bad a hear that [00:33:06] Speaker C: promise. I ain't hear Vic name at all. [00:33:08] Speaker D: Ain't no way we both missed it. [00:33:11] Speaker A: My man heard it. [00:33:18] Speaker C: You did not say that. I did. I said, [00:33:19] Speaker A: hey, Vic, what [00:33:20] Speaker D: we done? Pull up your chair. [00:33:21] Speaker B: So there's nothing she can do to ever come back from that. He has to forgive her. And I don't think he probably ever will because. Because even if he got a better job and made more money, he just gonna throw it back in her face. So this could be motivation for him to be with the next woman. [00:33:40] Speaker C: It's gonna be a tic tac. And that's the same thing that I was thinking. Cause it's gonna be a tic tac thing. But then he gonna go to the next woman and tell the next woman what that woman said. And that's just, you know, [00:33:53] Speaker B: and it could go that way or he's never going to remotely date someone who can compete with him. [00:34:00] Speaker D: Right. [00:34:01] Speaker B: Financially. Financially. Financially. So, I mean, I'll say this. I've said this before. I dated one woman who made way more money than me. And she let me know every chance that she got she had. Cause she was a doctor. That she made more money than me. And she little boyed me in a restaurant. One day. And the thing was, you know, I told this story, I had the receipt, and she reached across the table and snatched it in front of the thing and said, y' all boys at paper mill don't make this kind of money. And put a card out there. And I'm like, yeah, I had to keep my composure there. And I blocked her, too, so. [00:34:44] Speaker D: But that wasn't a tender moment. I think I would have blocked it, too, because. But you was done. Done. I think it's tender when you block somebody and then you wanna come back. I'm not gonna say it's tender just to block somebody. [00:34:53] Speaker C: So did she do it at all? Cause sometimes people need to be blocked. So did she do it, like, from, like, friends? That was a little. In front of people. [00:34:59] Speaker B: I mean, we was in a restaurant full of people. I mean, the little server dude was standing right there. Oh, okay. So, I mean, it don't matter. Like, I will say this. I feel like in private, you can get away with a lot more than you can in public, [00:35:15] Speaker C: right? [00:35:16] Speaker B: Yeah. That was still a public setting, even though nobody didn't know me. [00:35:19] Speaker C: Even though in private, though, Steve. Yeah. [00:35:21] Speaker D: I was just about to say, even in private, that's still a no. [00:35:23] Speaker C: You still got feelings. [00:35:25] Speaker B: But I can get over. I think as long as you publicly respect me. There's some things that I'm willing to take privately, [00:35:34] Speaker D: but I think sometimes people misconstrue that what you allow in private sometimes spill over into [00:35:38] Speaker C: the public, [00:35:39] Speaker B: and [00:35:39] Speaker C: it could they bring it to bot. If you allow it in private, they gonna bring it to the public. [00:35:44] Speaker B: I mean, we can joke around, but, like, there's things that me and my old lady, we can joke about at home that we just not gonna do in front of people. That's just. I mean, that's [00:35:53] Speaker A: just because of the look. And I think. Yeah, because of what people may think. [00:35:56] Speaker B: May think. I'm not degrading her, she not degrading me, but from an outside into like. [00:36:02] Speaker D: But again, like you said, y' all joke like that. Y' all have an understanding of what's joking and what's real. But in that situation, what you classify as being little boy. She's probably tried you like that in private. Yeah. And because the energy wasn't checked in, she felt she had the balls to be like, I've been paying for everything. [00:36:20] Speaker C: Give me this. Or [00:36:21] Speaker D: what? You know what I'm saying? She [00:36:23] Speaker B: wasn't paying for nothing. [00:36:24] Speaker D: But I'm saying something gave her. Something gave her the gumption to say, let Me get that. [00:36:30] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:36:31] Speaker D: You know what I'm saying? And not no slack to you, but I'm just saying that some people are like that. They feel like they've gotten the clearance to act a certain way. That's just like in abusive relationships. I have a cousin, she was just talking about that on her TikTok about being abused, and she said she used to be the abuser. She be quick to go and slap somebody, and so they buck back, and then they realized she was the one scared, and she started getting her ass beat. Cause sometimes you paved the way for people to act up with you, and then you run scared. Not saying that to you, but I'm just saying sometimes we open the door for people to act a certain way with us, and then we looking like, how did it get here? Because you didn't check that energy from the door or because you opened the door for something that you knew you wasn't gonna welcome in your life on an everyday [00:37:17] Speaker C: basis you wasn't even ready for. [00:37:19] Speaker D: Yeah. So with the letter, I really feel like y' all say it ain't bruised ego, but I really feel like it's in a nature. It's in the nature of a man to be a provider, to be the breadwinner or whatever. So when a woman comes at him, say what you want to say. Men need to be needed. And when you make a man feel like he has no place in your life, you got the money. If y' all ain't got no children, what you need me for? And when you come at him like that, that does bruise his ego. [00:37:48] Speaker B: So you feel like [00:37:49] Speaker D: it may be a trust thing overall, but I really feel like it's you playing it to the left. Like, what am I? I can't even be a man to you. Not saying I'm not a man, but I can't be a man for you if you making me feel like you don't need me. [00:38:02] Speaker B: So you saying men are leaders or they should lead? [00:38:06] Speaker D: Yes. [00:38:07] Speaker B: So let me ask you something. Are you willing to submit your paycheck? [00:38:10] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:38:11] Speaker B: For the better. Betterment of the relationship? Yep. What about you? So y' all submit that paycheck? [00:38:16] Speaker D: Sure will. Yeah. [00:38:17] Speaker B: Okay. [00:38:18] Speaker D: I've been brought up like that, raised that way and all. I know the position of not just a woman, but what a wife is supposed to do. [00:38:25] Speaker B: Okay. [00:38:26] Speaker D: And I understand that regardless of what my dollar sign say in my bank account, that when I'm a helpmate to my husband, not a man to my husband, you played a part, [00:38:35] Speaker B: but you got to get there. [00:38:37] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:38:37] Speaker B: So you can't just hold on. [00:38:40] Speaker D: A husband is not just a man. A husband is a leader. You got to be in a position of a leader in order to get a wife that submits. [00:38:46] Speaker B: But how can I know going forward that you're going to do this? But if I'm your man, you're not doing this because, you [00:38:52] Speaker D: know, you show wifely characteristics before you get a husband. [00:38:56] Speaker C: So, so basically you wanna. So basically you want the wifey duties without being a wife, is what you asking? [00:39:03] Speaker B: Basically. [00:39:04] Speaker A: I think what people get caught up. I think that's the mistake. People give boyfriend and girlfriend, husband and wife things when that shouldn't be the case. But I do think that when you're in a relationship, you should show that you are ready to be a wife through certain actions and certain things you do. We may not live together, so no, we're not doing that. Like, you know, so you're putting up a. So we're not doing certain things, but there are some things like, like as a man to show that I'm a, that I'm a husband thought being thoughtful, you know, taking charge. Something happens that you need that you need something without asking for it. You know what I'm saying? Like your car, your car got. Car got a flat. You know what I'm saying? Making sure you straight without you having to ask you calls it, hey, babe, my car broke down and I called aaa. I'm on the way. Yeah, week. I'll wait with you for AAA to get there because I, I'm honest with you. I struggle with cars. So I'm gonna come wait with you, you know, or I'm gonna take you to get something to eat until the tow truck come, you know what I'm saying? So stuff that's really thoughtful is something that can show that you're ready and then just making decisions. The, the worst thing, like I don't never ask because I hate the answer. I get back and this is what you want to eat? I would just go, I'm going to. Hey, we about to have, we about to have Chinese tonight? [00:40:21] Speaker C: Yeah, that's what I mean. Let's go. I think [00:40:23] Speaker A: no, but I think that's that what happens is that's, that's, that's, that's somebody showing leadership saying they're ready to be a husband. But the problem is we're, we, we could be sure we're ready to be a husband, but most women ain't ready to submit until they're a wife. [00:40:35] Speaker B: That's a Fact. [00:40:36] Speaker D: But the problem, the bigger problem is a lot of women. And I'mma come for us. A lot of women want a husband more than they want to be a wife. You got to want to be a wife more than you want the husband. You got to want to play the part. How y' all doing? The same way. The same way. The same way. What you say? [00:40:53] Speaker B: I'm clocking. [00:40:54] Speaker C: Oh, [00:40:55] Speaker D: I was looking this way. He [00:40:56] Speaker C: doing it wrong, but he doing it. Is [00:40:58] Speaker D: this. You need some nails? [00:41:02] Speaker B: No, you cooking. Come on, now. But [00:41:04] Speaker D: you get what I'm saying? It's like when you interview for a job, when you really want that job, you're gonna show them that you're ready [00:41:09] Speaker C: for the [00:41:09] Speaker D: position. If you want that position, you gonna show them. I'm gonna fill the position. [00:41:13] Speaker C: Right. [00:41:14] Speaker D: Be ready for the position. Not just the money that you gonna get from it. [00:41:19] Speaker C: That's it. [00:41:19] Speaker D: I wanna be a wife. So I wanna be a wife. Wife. I'm not just looking for a husband. I want to be a wife. So you don't play the role that you want to be. [00:41:26] Speaker C: Yep. That's how. But [00:41:28] Speaker D: most people, they just want the wedding. They [00:41:29] Speaker C: want the man, the [00:41:33] Speaker A: ceremony and the pictures and [00:41:34] Speaker C: the vacation. Yeah, this social media got them up. [00:41:37] Speaker B: So I'll say this. I think some people want to be a wife so much that they will continuously try to make the wrong person [00:41:46] Speaker A: the husband, [00:41:47] Speaker B: the husband. And vice versa. And vice versa. So [00:41:51] Speaker D: a lot of that comes from [00:41:52] Speaker C: trauma. That's true, too. [00:41:53] Speaker A: A lot of come from [00:41:54] Speaker B: what? Trauma? And I'll tell you this. I was. [00:41:56] Speaker D: I pick up be bro, too. What you mean? We don't pick some, man. Listen, I think [00:42:00] Speaker B: some people have been in relationships longer than they should have been based off of what other people would say. [00:42:06] Speaker D: Yes. [00:42:06] Speaker B: I don't want. Damn. Yoshi done seen me with two. I [00:42:10] Speaker D: got that. Why you don't post nobody? [00:42:12] Speaker B: I gotta stay with my mother. I gotta. I [00:42:15] Speaker C: gotta stay with them. Cause my family done. [00:42:18] Speaker D: You know what? I promise y'. All, we just had this conversation. I'm 45 years old, and my daddy was like, where you going? Listen, my kids got my location and everything. Like, if I go on a date, they be like, ma, I see you at. And they'll call me. Cause they. I hope y' all watch y' all niggas for that. They be blowing up my spot. But standing there to say, my dad be like, you ain't gonna bring your friend over here. I'm 45 years old. I ain't got no boyfriend like, you Ain't never. Unless I'm getting married, you ain't gonna meet nobody. Reason why? Because I'm auditioning. My mom used to tell me when I was younger, you can go in a dressing room with 10 outfits, come out with the one. [00:42:48] Speaker C: Come out with one that you like. [00:42:50] Speaker B: Let's back up the location thing. You share your location [00:42:53] Speaker D: with my kids, but they'll call my daddy until you wanna [00:42:57] Speaker C: share yours with nobody. [00:42:59] Speaker B: Unfortunately, I have to. [00:43:01] Speaker D: Cause I'm about to say, let me. Let me. Let me Facebook call her right now and tell her to get. [00:43:05] Speaker B: Unfortunately, I have to. I did not want to, but unfortunately, [00:43:09] Speaker A: so begrudgingly. [00:43:10] Speaker D: So listen, [00:43:11] Speaker C: why you don't want to. [00:43:13] Speaker B: Why should I? [00:43:15] Speaker C: You never know what goes on out here in the world today. No, [00:43:17] Speaker A: no, no, no, no, [00:43:18] Speaker D: no. Wait, wait, wait, wait. [00:43:19] Speaker A: The moat is not about the action. It's about the motive. All right, so it's not about the. The motive ain't. I want to check on your safety. The motive is I need to know where you at. [00:43:32] Speaker D: That's why [00:43:32] Speaker C: some people. [00:43:33] Speaker D: Yeah, okay, so listen. I have four [00:43:36] Speaker C: sons. [00:43:39] Speaker D: All four of my sons have my location. I only got one son that a stalker. And he'll tell the pack when I go. Going somewhere. But I have two of their locations. The two that are in the army, they like. Nah. You might call and tell somebody. Do [00:43:54] Speaker C: you have your kids location? [00:43:55] Speaker B: No, I [00:43:55] Speaker D: have two of mine, but I don't stalk them. But it's for safety. I have a son that's an emt. So if something was to happen, you know, he want me to. He actually gave me his location because of the job he works. You are locating the phone. But I' ma see. Huh. [00:44:09] Speaker B: That's to the phone. That's not to the person. [00:44:10] Speaker D: Exactly. [00:44:13] Speaker C: That's the last location that they at. [00:44:14] Speaker D: Yeah, but my. You got my location. [00:44:17] Speaker A: Leave my phone at home. [00:44:19] Speaker D: No, but they [00:44:20] Speaker C: know you won't [00:44:21] Speaker B: forward it to my other phone. [00:44:23] Speaker D: Nah, but I mean, that's what y' all do. My boys know I done went to work late because I left my phone. [00:44:29] Speaker C: Kids of mine, [00:44:31] Speaker D: that phone with [00:44:32] Speaker C: me. And if the phone look like it's on the wrong side of the road, I'm calling. Hey, [00:44:37] Speaker B: see what I mean? [00:44:37] Speaker C: Why that phone look like. Why is you on the other side of the road? Where you at? What you doing? [00:44:41] Speaker D: I sleep with my phone and all. I'm talking about y'. All. I got the bad. I ain't lying, [00:44:46] Speaker B: I guess. Cause I don't. [00:44:47] Speaker D: If I go to the bathroom, the phone. And if I'm taking a shower. The phone right there. I mean, my phone is always within reach. But you promise my blood pressure go up if that phone ain't near me. [00:44:54] Speaker B: We come. We. Maybe not. I think you young. We come from an era that Chris Rock said it the best. Your mama and your daddy left home and your mom and your daddy didn't talk again till they got back home. [00:45:06] Speaker C: And [00:45:06] Speaker B: they didn't need no location. And everybody was. What it was like. We didn't. If [00:45:10] Speaker A: it was an emergency, there was a payphone. [00:45:12] Speaker B: Yeah, [00:45:12] Speaker D: okay. We don't [00:45:13] Speaker C: like payphones no more. [00:45:16] Speaker B: You [00:45:16] Speaker A: don't need no [00:45:17] Speaker B: lucky. Funny. But [00:45:19] Speaker D: that generation cheated real bad. [00:45:21] Speaker C: There wasn't no [00:45:22] Speaker A: generation. [00:45:22] Speaker C: Everybody didn't crazy back then. [00:45:24] Speaker A: Everybody. Now [00:45:25] Speaker C: what you say? [00:45:26] Speaker D: Everybody ain't got caught? [00:45:27] Speaker A: Everybody didn't cheat [00:45:28] Speaker D: in some way [00:45:29] Speaker B: in order for somebody to be cheating? You got. [00:45:31] Speaker C: Y' all don't think everybody was. They had a whole [00:45:33] Speaker D: song. Papa was a Rolling stone. [00:45:35] Speaker A: And that's. That's. That's to say everybody is a. [00:45:38] Speaker B: That's a. That's. [00:45:39] Speaker A: That's an absolute statement. [00:45:41] Speaker C: Y' all know, cheated back then. [00:45:43] Speaker B: I. I was young. [00:45:45] Speaker C: Yeah. You knew somebody. Say. Say you ain't knew your daddy and granted your dad. Your granddaddy wasn't somebody [00:45:49] Speaker D: your generation. [00:45:51] Speaker B: I mean. I mean, I ain't see it. [00:45:52] Speaker A: Well, let me say. Let me say. I'll say this. Never saw my grandmother date anybody or be with anybody. Never saw granddad. I saw him. I only saw. I only saw. Remember? I only see. I only seen my grandfather was in the same room with him once in my entire life. [00:46:07] Speaker D: You know, that's your real granddaddy. [00:46:08] Speaker A: That's my real [00:46:08] Speaker C: grandd. [00:46:09] Speaker A: Once in my entire life. Never. The [00:46:11] Speaker D: man I thought was my granddaddy for a little while was not granddaddy. I. Cuz my real granddaddy died. I was like 6 years old. So the guy that my grandma was dating that I really thought was just her friend, but I found out when I got older that was really her boyfriend. I thought that was our granddad. [00:46:25] Speaker A: No, I didn't. I never knew. My grandmother [00:46:27] Speaker D: died [00:46:29] Speaker C: then. [00:46:29] Speaker A: Now my dad, my father, [00:46:32] Speaker C: he took out this daddy. [00:46:33] Speaker A: No, no, my. My. My dad out there was. Out there. He [00:46:36] Speaker C: took out. [00:46:38] Speaker A: I. I cannot. I can. And my dad watches the show and I've talked about him repeatedly. [00:46:41] Speaker D: I ain't going to talk about my daddy. [00:46:44] Speaker A: He. He'll hit me up. That's not the right story, son. This is the way you tell it, cuz. He. He has this take on why [00:46:50] Speaker D: why black men. I got some room to talk. [00:46:53] Speaker A: He has this. He has this thing about why why black men cheat. His his rationale. And he says this is his rationale. And y' all knew I His rationale is he says, what were we brought here to do, son? And I said, what you mean brought? What you said I was brought here. He was like, as slaves. What was you brought here to do? I said, to work. He said, no, to multiply. He said it's to make as many women pregnant as possible. He said, so I'm just fulfilling my destiny. I said that did [00:47:23] Speaker C: what he was supposed to do. [00:47:23] Speaker A: He said that show [00:47:25] Speaker B: but some but. And [00:47:27] Speaker A: that logic. There's something to it. [00:47:29] Speaker B: There's something to it. [00:47:30] Speaker A: There's something to that. [00:47:31] Speaker B: I get it. Because he ain't taking it from nobody. So there's some people out there that they giving it up. So I can't knock nobody for how they think they [00:47:42] Speaker C: for sure [00:47:44] Speaker B: you signed up for it. It is what it is. [00:47:46] Speaker D: Jesus. [00:47:46] Speaker A: Yeah, so I mean he. But I love him to death, but he right now he's married been committed in his. In a committed relationship for. In his marriage for about seven, eight years now. [00:47:57] Speaker B: That's what's up. [00:47:58] Speaker C: That's good. [00:47:58] Speaker A: Now mind you, he's 75, but [00:48:00] Speaker C: ain't [00:48:00] Speaker B: nothing wrong with that. [00:48:01] Speaker A: But you know, very vibrant. 75 in his [00:48:05] Speaker D: and [00:48:05] Speaker A: very much in love. So let's get into some comments before we give our final from our social media. First one, Casey, I'm a Capricorn said good morning. Apologize for the comment without having full context. It's not her fault he feels the insecurity. I'm also sure his feelings about the situation has found their way to unfavorable communication and honest conversation in a different setting needs to be made. If this is something that is truly a problem for him, it's time to separate due to this being deeper than a paycheck. What is causing you to feel this way? If we are truly a team. She shouldn't have said what she said. Next one, Black Hawaii. Your boy [00:48:47] Speaker D: aggravating sale. [00:48:48] Speaker A: That insecurity he mentioned might have been him thinking that she doesn't respect him because he earns less. Her weaponizing his insecurity during the argument might have validated his feelings. She doesn't respect me because I make less than her. There's no expiration date on her, so if so if she wants to repair the damage, she needs to apologize as many times as it takes. And she has to be specific. I'm talking accountability. You trusted me with your feelings, and I broke that trust by using it against you to win an argument that was disrespectful. But I do respect and appreciate you. I was wrong. And I want to earn your trust again. What's one thing I can start doing today to earn trust and bring us closer together? [00:49:29] Speaker D: I agree with his answer, though. Yeah. I mean, she might as well just copy that. Go ahead and read what that boy said. Not that boy. Excuse me, man. Let me. Let me not do that. [00:49:37] Speaker B: Cause I ain't [00:49:37] Speaker D: trying to [00:49:38] Speaker B: see how long. [00:49:38] Speaker D: I ain't trying to listen me and him argue all the time. [00:49:41] Speaker B: I get it. That [00:49:42] Speaker D: why I said let me correct that for the live. Well, it ain't the live, but you know what I'm saying. I promise you he gonna chase me on that. Calling him a boy. [00:49:49] Speaker A: Hey, we got two more. I hate to reread this. I feel like it doesn't matter how many times she says she's sorry, and no matter what she does to try to make it up, he is still gonna think about that one time she insulted him. It's most definitely in his pride. And he's not gonna open back up to her in the way she wants ever again because of the way he was treated the first time. And that's from Kellyanne from the no Sugar Couldn't Sugarcoat and podcast. [00:50:12] Speaker C: No, that's true. [00:50:14] Speaker A: Yeah. I don't think he's ever. I just don't think that's gonna [00:50:16] Speaker C: happen Back up tour. Why would she [00:50:18] Speaker D: even. He do open up about something. It'll never be on that level. [00:50:21] Speaker A: No. No, not at all. And then. Ibrahim, Kareem. What's up, cuz? Shortly. Shorty, can you holla at me? Because I don't care how much money you make. [00:50:32] Speaker D: No, he was gonna come with something crazy. [00:50:33] Speaker A: He said, shorty, you can holla at me. Cause I don't care how much money you make. Son is stupid for even saying that. If you want to make more than your lady, then elevate yourself, basically, if you want to make more. And like you said to your point, Vic, you was like, hey, man, that should be motivation to get out there, get your hustle up, get your grind up. Because if you're so bothered by how much money your lady makes, then why are you not doing things to put yourself in a better situation? Because I don't believe it's her problem. It's his problem. [00:51:06] Speaker C: So can I ask a question? [00:51:07] Speaker A: And in the sense of it's his insecurities. That made that hurt so bad. Because if I'm a secure dude, if I'm secure and I'm. There's a chance I'm not gonna make as much money because I teach. So if I. If I date somebody who's making more money, that's going to be mostly common than not. But I'm securing myself. [00:51:26] Speaker C: Right. [00:51:27] Speaker A: And so. But I think she's talking to his own insecurities is what made her kind of lash out. Well, shoot. If you got a problem with how much money you make, like, I think it was a reaction that wasn't right. No, but I think it starts with him and his own insecurities. Because if I'm secure, you can't insult somebody who can't be insulted. If I'm securing myself, you can't insult me. If I'm secure in what I do. My job. I love my job to death. I wouldn't rather be doing nothing else. I know I don't make a bunch of money, so you can't insult me by calling me broke. Yes, I am. [00:51:58] Speaker C: That's right. [00:51:59] Speaker A: And. What? [00:52:00] Speaker B: No, no, no, no, no, no. [00:52:03] Speaker A: I'm just saying. I'm just saying in that sense, if somebody wants to say [00:52:06] Speaker C: that, that was gonna be my question. It was like, would y' all date somebody that was making more than you? [00:52:12] Speaker B: No. [00:52:14] Speaker D: Why? Because that doctor hurt your feelings. [00:52:16] Speaker C: Oh, God. I forgot. Good call back. I forgot he went through that. [00:52:21] Speaker B: No, but to be honest with you, I mean, that's still in the back of my mind, but. But, you know, not to be funny, but that's. I don't run in those type circles that that would happen for me to meet somebody like that. You get what I'm saying? Okay. I'm in a relationship. [00:52:37] Speaker C: Right? [00:52:38] Speaker B: Yeah. So it was. [00:52:39] Speaker C: So now. Now you wouldn't. Well, now you even [00:52:42] Speaker B: back after. Even after that, probably, but [00:52:44] Speaker D: did that play a part in it? [00:52:47] Speaker B: I think it would. I think it would, to be honest with you. It [00:52:50] Speaker C: would. [00:52:51] Speaker B: I think it would. I [00:52:52] Speaker C: think so. Yeah. I wouldn't either. I'd be like, [00:52:56] Speaker B: so what about it? Like, even, like, you know, I. I thought about it, like, what if I was dating, like, a real, real, real. Like a famous person? I don't think I could handle that. [00:53:05] Speaker A: Oh, I could. [00:53:06] Speaker B: You think you could? So I saw a movie. [00:53:09] Speaker A: I definitely could. [00:53:09] Speaker B: When Karuchi was in some movie she just did, and she was kissing all on this man. And Carla said, you know, that's Dion Wife. I'm like, I don't know if I'd be Comfortable with you making millions and you kissing all on somebody. Well, [00:53:23] Speaker A: I think. I think you gotta [00:53:24] Speaker C: know movie wise, though, but [00:53:26] Speaker A: I mean, I think you. You. I could because it's about how much can you accept people for who they are. [00:53:33] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:33] Speaker A: And a part. Sometimes a part of their job is what they do. So like. So some like. Like dating for me is a struggle. Struggle. And the struggle is because when it comes to like the season, I don't have the time. [00:53:44] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:53:45] Speaker A: So if you're looking for time and you lack understanding of what I do, this is going to be a problem for you. And I think. But that's your problem. It's not mine. Exactly. When you met me, this is what I was. And you chose to be here. So if I met a famous woman and I thought she was fine, I chose to be there. So I can't have a problem with anything she does because I chose to be here. And I knew. I knew she was in movies before I met her. I knew she was kissing on people. I knew her breast was out when I met her, but I didn't because that's her profession at the time that I met her. I should have not approached her. [00:54:19] Speaker B: But we have. But Yoshi, we really have to morph if we're gonna make this work and we supposed to be together. There's some things some people just gonna have to give up. Not saying you're coaching, but it's just some things that you just got to make time for or some things I know I just can't do no more. [00:54:34] Speaker A: Right. But that's. But that's the thing. [00:54:36] Speaker C: So you would rather her give up her. You would rather her give up her acting, her. Her career and date you? [00:54:43] Speaker B: What I'm saying is, is there's movie roles out there that ain't nobody. Ain't nobody getting naked. [00:54:48] Speaker A: So I get what you're saying, but [00:54:50] Speaker C: if [00:54:50] Speaker A: you would want her to make a compromise. [00:54:51] Speaker C: Yeah, [00:54:52] Speaker B: yeah. I [00:54:52] Speaker D: mean, even if they have movies like that, they have dummies or stunt dummies or whatever that fill in where they show your face, but when they get to that intimate part, they have a [00:55:00] Speaker C: feeling sometimes. [00:55:02] Speaker D: Huh. [00:55:03] Speaker C: They probably do that like. [00:55:04] Speaker B: And they could, but I use that. But I. I just really thought, you know, Dion is a very public, positive figure that I think he really is. And you know, it's already in stigma with the age difference. And I'm looking at it like, dog. Like, she's really out here, you know, kissing and hugging on. I was like, why is she even in movies? I Mean, I know she want to make her own money, but I'm like. Like you, Dion, you know, probably soon to be wife. Like, you ain't got to be doing this. The [00:55:30] Speaker D: price tag can't be. You know, you gotta pick and choose. So [00:55:34] Speaker C: that's. I would definitely feel that way. Like, yo, your partner, your person. That [00:55:40] Speaker D: definitely wouldn't be my person. I couldn't date somebody who's famous. I ain't dating no gynecologist. I ain't. It's a lot of things that I know I couldn't stomach. No, you've been looking at coochie all day. [00:55:49] Speaker A: Okay, [00:55:52] Speaker C: okay. All right, [00:55:54] Speaker A: we'll close on that. [00:55:55] Speaker D: That's really what it is. [00:55:56] Speaker B: That is not that. That is the fun. I will say this. I don't think you. I'm gonna leave that. [00:56:04] Speaker C: That's the same thing. Like y' all saying y' all don't want the act. Y' all don't want the actress to be over there kissing the. Hugging it. Kiss. No people with a. With a. That's [00:56:14] Speaker D: what I'm feel. [00:56:14] Speaker C: She don't want nobody. That look, [00:56:17] Speaker D: you come in the house trying to be sexy for your man. He like, I done saw 15 of them all day. Like, girl gone. [00:56:22] Speaker B: Yeah, but you getting in your G wagon. Sitting in your G wagon, [00:56:29] Speaker C: too. Same thing. But she gonna went out there and kiss that man on set. [00:56:33] Speaker D: Be like, how many kisses you took to get this G? [00:56:37] Speaker C: You still got [00:56:38] Speaker D: kicks in, too. How many licks it took to get to the cigarette? [00:56:42] Speaker A: All right. Hey, listen, [00:56:44] Speaker D: man, I ain't doing it. [00:56:45] Speaker A: Vic. Ke. [00:56:46] Speaker C: Thank y'. All. [00:56:47] Speaker A: Thank y' all for being on. [00:56:48] Speaker B: Thank you. [00:56:49] Speaker A: Really [00:56:50] Speaker C: appreciate [00:56:50] Speaker A: y' all being on. We gotta do it again. Please don't [00:56:53] Speaker C: be a stranger. [00:56:54] Speaker D: You didn't thank me. I. [00:56:55] Speaker A: I don't want to thank you. You. You going to be here next week. Well, no, you're not. You're going to be on vacation again. You [00:57:00] Speaker D: need to pray next week. Come [00:57:01] Speaker B: off for fmla, didn't you? [00:57:02] Speaker A: No, she go back home. She came. She came home for the special episode. I forgot. They [00:57:08] Speaker C: said you been gone for two weeks. [00:57:10] Speaker D: Huh? They going be loving in two weeks. [00:57:12] Speaker A: Hey, forget Angel. This [00:57:13] Speaker D: is my birthday month. [00:57:14] Speaker A: Angel took a vacation today. Angel didn't think the show was important, so she took a vacation. [00:57:19] Speaker D: Y' all should be activating [00:57:21] Speaker B: time and all that. [00:57:22] Speaker A: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Apparently. Apparently, I paid time off. [00:57:28] Speaker D: Listen, the moment I put in my fmla, y' all saw how he posted. And guess what? Because I'm a whole fool, I Shared it. Cause who you trying to replace? Who you trying to replace? I ain't going nowhere. [00:57:40] Speaker A: I ain't trying to replace nobody. We do. But we do [00:57:42] Speaker D: the whole hiring. I'm saying, he ain't put a flyer up by me. [00:57:46] Speaker A: Hey, what happened? What happens when. When you go out on fmla, [00:57:49] Speaker D: they got somebody doing your job? Listen, he talking about he need reliable, reliable people. He did [00:57:54] Speaker B: say that. [00:57:54] Speaker D: He got that for me. He coming for me. [00:57:58] Speaker A: They coming [00:57:59] Speaker D: for me. He's somebody who ain't sensitive and everything I said, oh, yep, I am sensitive. I argue with him every time. First [00:58:05] Speaker A: off, you know, [00:58:06] Speaker C: our recording [00:58:06] Speaker A: schedule is. You know, our recording schedule is tedious. So it's gotta be somebody who's reliable. Cause we record a lot throughout the week, so it can't be. We got a live show we gotta do. We gotta meet about stuff. We gotta talk about stuff. [00:58:17] Speaker D: You say you tired of me arguing with him. I argue with him every week because he said we shooting at 6 o'. Clock. And I get here and he's still setting up. If you told me to be here at 6, we need to start shooting [00:58:27] Speaker A: to cut that. I'm cutting that all the way out. All right? So that ain't gonna be seen. Anyway, thank y' all once again. All right, here's for my final thought. All right? Before you ask somebody to let their guard down, check what you do when they actually do it. Can you hear without losing respect? Can you hear without hurt making? And can you hear without making it a competition? Can you get angry without reaching there for their deepest insecurity? You can tell anything ought to mean something after they tell you. Much love, Vic and Keisha. Thank you for joining us. Don't forget that we're on the road to 500 YouTube subscribers by December 1st. Subscribe, share the episode and answer the question. And share this. Answer the questions. Have you ever opened up and regretted it? It's Yousef in the building here with Chanel for the relationship Status podcast. Shouts out to Vic a Keisha, go. Make sure you follow them on social media. Vic, how can they follow you? They can't. They can't. Keisha. [00:59:21] Speaker C: That's Lakeisha right on Facebook. Okay, thank you. [00:59:26] Speaker B: Lady, don't play that. [00:59:28] Speaker A: All right, y', all, he [00:59:29] Speaker C: gonna be in trouble. [00:59:30] Speaker A: This is relationship. This is relationship status. You [00:59:33] Speaker D: don't want about to follow me. I'm not liking this. You can follow me at Nellie Pooh underscore speaks on Instagram and Chanel. Chanel on Facebook. You gonna stop acting like this with me. [00:59:44] Speaker A: But, you know, it's going to be a little thing down at the bottom. You better make sure it right. It's going to be right, man. It's been relationship status where we are making relationships better. One conversation at a time. Until next time, y', all, we're out. Peace.