March 25, 2024


238th Date: Men Are Supposed To Lie To Women

Hosted by

Yusuf In The Building C.L. Butler Nique Crews
238th Date: Men Are Supposed To Lie To Women
Relationship Status Podcast
238th Date: Men Are Supposed To Lie To Women

Mar 25 2024 | 01:11:07


Show Notes

Hosts: C.L. Nique, & Yusuf 

In this episode,  Nique, Yusuf & C.L. are joined by guest host K Antoinette for an insightful discussion on the Frasier Allen Allen Theory. In this episode, the team gets into topics such as setting boundaries, navigating expectations, and decoding the complexities of communication between partners.

The team explores the dynamics of dating multiple people, the importance of mutual respect, and the significance of listening versus hearing in relationships. With candid anecdotes and thought-provoking conversations, the episode offers practical advice on finding balance, building trust, and fostering healthy connections in today's dating landscape.

From discussing the balance between independence and partnership to sharing personal experiences of growth and self-discovery, the crew gives a refreshing perspective on love, romance, and commitment. Whether you're single, in a relationship, or exploring the dating scene, this episode offers valuable takeaways and relatable anecdotes that resonate with listeners on their own relationship journeys.

Join the Relationship Status Podcast for an insightful and entertaining exploration of love, dating, and everything in between, with K Antoinette bringing her unique perspective to the conversation. Don't miss out on this enriching episode filled with laughter, introspection, and invaluable advice for navigating the complexities of modern romance.

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Episode Transcript

[00:00:00] Speaker A: You do you have a podcast that you're passionate about? Are you looking for a professional studio to help bring your vision to life? Then look no further than Crux Media Group Studios. Located at nine three West Evans street in Florence, South Carolina, Crux Media Group Studios is a full service podcast studio that offers recording, editing, consultation, live streaming, video recording and more. We have state of the art equipment and team of experienced professionals who can help you create a podcast that is professional, polished and engaging. Whether you're a first time podcaster or a seasoned pro, Crux Media Group Studios can help you take your podcast to the next level. Contact us today at 843-407-1673 to learn more about our services and to schedule a consultation. [00:01:04] Speaker B: Welcome back to relationship status. Isha girl, Nate Cruz, Cl Butler and. [00:01:09] Speaker C: Your boy Yusuf in the building. Remember, you can find us on all podcast platforms. If you want to join the conversation, email us re l s T a T podcast or join the Facebook group. Just search relationship status podcast Cl Nick we are back once again. [00:01:26] Speaker D: We are glad to be back. [00:01:27] Speaker C: Glad to be back. All three. [00:01:30] Speaker B: Welcome back. Welcome back, welcome. [00:01:33] Speaker C: That's your song. [00:01:33] Speaker D: Whatever we do now, which welcome back. Are you singing? [00:01:38] Speaker B: Welcome back. Harder. [00:01:39] Speaker D: The one from the show or the mace version? Didn't mace have a version when he came back from being a pastor? [00:01:48] Speaker C: When he came back. [00:01:50] Speaker D: The hints. Welcome back. Welcome back. Welcome back. [00:01:54] Speaker C: And we also welcome him back. Yes, we are a recurring host. She's family. [00:02:00] Speaker B: She's not in the drum roll, please, not a guest. Just leave it alone. [00:02:04] Speaker C: You can hit the drum roll. [00:02:05] Speaker B: Where is it? [00:02:07] Speaker C: On the side of the chair. [00:02:08] Speaker D: Hey, guys, we have people listening. [00:02:15] Speaker B: I said don't worry about it. [00:02:20] Speaker C: You could do the drum roll on the side of the chair. [00:02:22] Speaker E: You didn't. [00:02:23] Speaker D: Okay, now we're going back to you self communicating. [00:02:26] Speaker C: Oh, my God. [00:02:27] Speaker D: That's what he told you. He said you can press the. [00:02:31] Speaker C: I didn't say press the button. I said you can do it. [00:02:32] Speaker D: I didn't say button. [00:02:33] Speaker B: You said I can press it. [00:02:35] Speaker C: I didn't say you can press. I said you can do it. [00:02:36] Speaker D: Okay, but do what? [00:02:38] Speaker C: Okay. Cancer. [00:02:39] Speaker D: That's back, apparently. Yes. New Year, same dysfunction. [00:02:47] Speaker E: That's usually how it works. [00:02:49] Speaker D: Yes. How have you been? [00:02:51] Speaker E: I've been good. I've been good. [00:02:52] Speaker D: Okay. Anybody got any questions? [00:02:55] Speaker B: K antoinette, where you been? [00:02:56] Speaker E: Because you try not to be messy. [00:02:58] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm not going to be messy. I just got one coming. [00:03:02] Speaker E: I've been working, I've been around, enjoying life. [00:03:06] Speaker C: I saw one day right outside of. [00:03:09] Speaker E: Work so you going to be the one that's going to be messy? [00:03:12] Speaker C: No, I said hello. [00:03:14] Speaker E: Yeah, I remember. [00:03:15] Speaker B: Okay. [00:03:17] Speaker C: I might even be about right. [00:03:19] Speaker E: No, you're right. I remember that day. You saw me right outside the hotel. [00:03:22] Speaker C: Yeah, I saw you right outside the hotel. [00:03:24] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:03:24] Speaker B: See, she works at a hotel. [00:03:26] Speaker D: Yes. [00:03:26] Speaker E: She works at the spa, at the. [00:03:30] Speaker C: Spotist, inside of the hotel. [00:03:33] Speaker D: So what were you doing at the hotel? [00:03:34] Speaker B: That's a real question. [00:03:35] Speaker C: Take care of some rooms for some people. [00:03:37] Speaker D: Oh, yeah. Take care of rooms for people. [00:03:39] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:03:40] Speaker D: So you're like a concierge now? No, we got a little. For the man. Do you think you have to explain to us? [00:03:48] Speaker C: I was just saying. [00:03:49] Speaker D: But can't explain some things. [00:03:51] Speaker C: What does she have to explain? [00:03:53] Speaker E: What do I need to explain? [00:03:55] Speaker D: There's some stuff on the Internet that I need to question you about. [00:03:59] Speaker E: I mean, fire away. [00:04:00] Speaker D: Why would you walk it on a man's back? [00:04:03] Speaker E: That is a form of massage. [00:04:05] Speaker D: No. [00:04:06] Speaker E: Ashiatsu. [00:04:07] Speaker D: Ashiatsu. No. Okay. [00:04:10] Speaker E: I told you about that before. [00:04:12] Speaker D: No, you haven't. She didn't tell me you were on the show. [00:04:17] Speaker E: See? [00:04:18] Speaker D: No. [00:04:18] Speaker C: Yeah, because she talked about what she was actually. I don't think you were doing it yet. [00:04:21] Speaker D: I never saw the pictures. I saw the pictures. Video is a video, too. Yeah. [00:04:27] Speaker C: She got a video. [00:04:28] Speaker D: Oh, my God. I ain't go that far. [00:04:30] Speaker E: Jesus. [00:04:31] Speaker D: I ain't go that far. [00:04:32] Speaker E: You don't like seat? [00:04:34] Speaker D: I'm not a foot fan. No. I'm not giving them massages or touching people's feet. [00:04:38] Speaker E: Really? You got that personality. It's not surprising. [00:04:41] Speaker D: Yes. You should never be surprised. [00:04:46] Speaker B: And I'm always surprised. [00:04:47] Speaker D: Yeah. I'm a lot of things. [00:04:50] Speaker E: It's actually a really good form of massage. It's a deep massage. [00:04:54] Speaker D: Deep tissue massage. [00:04:55] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:04:55] Speaker D: Now, is that like, a weight requirement? Because what if you want, like, a BBW? [00:05:00] Speaker E: It is a weight requirement because I. [00:05:01] Speaker D: Don'T think all women can grab the bars up top and do it. [00:05:05] Speaker E: It's a weight requirement. [00:05:07] Speaker D: That's a weight requirement. So what's the weight requirement? [00:05:09] Speaker E: I'm not sure we have one. They talked about it in class. I just can't remember. [00:05:13] Speaker B: But probably 150. [00:05:15] Speaker C: So basically, you have to keep your weight down. Not you personally. I mean, you don't have to, but somebody else might need to. [00:05:23] Speaker E: But I will say that when I took the training for it, that one of the women, she was taller than me and she was a thicker woman, she was volumptuous and she gave a great massage. So it's not like how you know. [00:05:35] Speaker D: She gave a great massage because we. [00:05:36] Speaker E: Had to work on each other. [00:05:38] Speaker C: So she walked on your back. [00:05:40] Speaker D: She was not voluntuous and walked on your back, Kate. Okay, I do not believe that. [00:05:45] Speaker E: All right, I got pictures. [00:05:46] Speaker D: Cake. [00:05:47] Speaker E: I got pictures. [00:05:48] Speaker D: Without saying what? You weigh 126, walk on your back. A toddler. [00:05:56] Speaker E: You said a toddler can walk. [00:05:57] Speaker D: Yes, that's it. Nobody. [00:06:00] Speaker B: Shame she had to wait. [00:06:04] Speaker C: Shame her. [00:06:05] Speaker D: It's not shaming your body, it's the other people. I don't think so. A woman to walk on your back in the itchy Miyaki massages. Is that yoragami? I don't know. [00:06:22] Speaker E: Okay. [00:06:27] Speaker D: I'm going to go back to tell you what made that popular. [00:06:29] Speaker E: Okay, go ahead. [00:06:31] Speaker D: A lot of people don't know this, but I know educating, you know, I will. Okay, well, let's talk about this first. [00:06:36] Speaker E: Okay. [00:06:36] Speaker D: If you weigh 126, the person needs to be less than you. [00:06:40] Speaker E: Not necessarily. [00:06:42] Speaker D: So she could weigh like 185. [00:06:45] Speaker E: You want me to explain? [00:06:46] Speaker D: You could. [00:06:47] Speaker E: Okay. [00:06:47] Speaker D: It'll be funny if I explain, but I will let you explain since you want to deal with facts and all this stuff. [00:06:54] Speaker E: So you have bars, right? [00:06:56] Speaker D: Yes, I saw the bars. [00:06:57] Speaker B: Right. [00:06:57] Speaker E: So that is for you to adjust your pressure. I'm not putting my full body weight on somebody just because I'm adjusting for what they need. So just because I weigh 126 don't mean they're going to get 126 pounds on their back. [00:07:11] Speaker D: So approximately how much pressure do you apply from your 126 frame? [00:07:15] Speaker E: I don't know. It's a feeling like you feel it. I don't know. [00:07:18] Speaker D: Okay, but what if she don't have the same feeling you have and she weighed 150 and she put 149 on your back? [00:07:23] Speaker E: That's what you got training for. So you can know how to adjust. [00:07:27] Speaker D: So how you know, you passed the class. [00:07:29] Speaker E: You have an instructor, you have tests, you have practicals that you have to take to be able to do it properly. [00:07:36] Speaker D: Oh, so you all serious? Okay. [00:07:39] Speaker E: You working on somebody body and back and they skeletal system and muscles. You're not going to be serious. [00:07:44] Speaker D: Yes, you are. And I'm believing the power of massage and stretching. [00:07:49] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:07:49] Speaker E: Yes. [00:07:50] Speaker C: I got to get into stretching. [00:07:52] Speaker E: Stretching. Most of my clients, I tell them half your issue is that you don't stretch. [00:07:56] Speaker D: You don't stretch. [00:07:57] Speaker E: I stretch during my routine because it helps so much. [00:08:00] Speaker D: And they tight. [00:08:02] Speaker E: Your muscles want to move. [00:08:03] Speaker D: That's why a lot of people be mad. They don't even know it because they need to stretch or they broke. Either or. Listen, I did the research. [00:08:13] Speaker E: That's valid. [00:08:14] Speaker D: Yeah. He beef him, he probably need to stretch and he gets some money. [00:08:19] Speaker E: Okay. [00:08:19] Speaker D: Yeah. Sometimes just borrowing money from somebody else and just holding your pocket will make. [00:08:24] Speaker E: You feel better and tell him all he need to do to fix his problems is stretch. [00:08:28] Speaker D: Yeah, he might need it. Hey, you need to stretch. Drink some water. I don't think there's hydration value to in Hennessy, but hey, let it go. That's all. [00:08:40] Speaker E: We got so many different things out of that one point. [00:08:44] Speaker D: We did. [00:08:44] Speaker E: I don't know where we ended up. [00:08:46] Speaker B: I don't know how we got here. [00:08:47] Speaker D: That's why we're professionals. Now let's go back to. What's the name of your massages? [00:08:50] Speaker C: Ashiatsu. [00:08:52] Speaker D: Okay. The first time this was popularized, a lot of people don't know this was on the. Exactly what did George get? [00:09:09] Speaker E: Passing. [00:09:09] Speaker C: But now he got the Ashiasu. [00:09:10] Speaker D: He got that. She wasn't even trying to. [00:09:14] Speaker C: He was laying on the ground. It's actually in the opening credits of the. [00:09:17] Speaker D: It is of the show. [00:09:19] Speaker E: Well, a lot of times when people are asking, I just know it's like walking on your back. Because it's more than walking on your back, it's more. But you have to talk in terms that people can understand. [00:09:29] Speaker C: Put a little bit of twinkle toes in there. [00:09:30] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:09:31] Speaker E: You got to know how to move your ankles and right body posture so you don't hurt yourself. [00:09:36] Speaker D: So don't never get weird with certain clients. [00:09:38] Speaker E: Not only that, that's massage. Some of that. [00:09:42] Speaker D: Oh, it does. It's some of them boys out there or ladies. [00:09:48] Speaker E: One of the reasons why I ended up leaving that job at the beach was because I had to get real rough around. [00:09:55] Speaker D: Yeah, it's a lot of dumb older. [00:09:58] Speaker E: People with all that retirement money. They thought they was going to buy a whole bunch of things. [00:10:02] Speaker D: Oh, really? [00:10:03] Speaker B: A happy ending. [00:10:04] Speaker D: Do tell. [00:10:05] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:10:06] Speaker D: Yousef and eat. [00:10:09] Speaker E: Do tell. What? [00:10:11] Speaker D: Wow. Okay. [00:10:12] Speaker C: Happy ending. [00:10:14] Speaker D: Well, see, what you should have did is let us investigate who they are so we can set them up. [00:10:20] Speaker E: Do you mean set them up? [00:10:21] Speaker C: Put them up. [00:10:22] Speaker D: We only going to get 20%. We're only going to get 20%. [00:10:26] Speaker B: 20%. [00:10:27] Speaker D: That's it. 80 is yours. [00:10:29] Speaker E: I had a lot of offers for bodyguards, but I can take care of. [00:10:32] Speaker D: Okay, 126 because you know Shiatzu. Okay, so do you do water massage, too? [00:10:42] Speaker E: No, that's a different form. Usually. Like a lot of spots, they do it with the Vinci showers, but we don't have the room for that at our spa. [00:10:53] Speaker D: You don't? Okay. That's cool. Anything you want to share with us about massaging or where they can. Do you do private? [00:11:01] Speaker E: What do you mean private? [00:11:04] Speaker D: Can someone hire you? No, private makes it sound a little more sleazy. [00:11:07] Speaker C: Right? [00:11:08] Speaker B: Some people do, like, home calls and stuff. [00:11:11] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:11:11] Speaker C: In call? No, out call. [00:11:13] Speaker E: I will say this, if I take that route, because I have it. I do have my equipment, but you'd have to come see me at the spot first. I got to feel your energy, see if you're serious. [00:11:23] Speaker D: Well, we actually have extra room here, so we're offering massages and podcasting so you'd be relaxed for your podcast. [00:11:29] Speaker E: I like that idea. [00:11:30] Speaker D: We'll get a workout. [00:11:31] Speaker C: We will get it. [00:11:32] Speaker B: Trying to spin it? [00:11:33] Speaker D: No, because a lot of people don't know this. We are a wellness center, too, because podcasting is a form of therapy. [00:11:39] Speaker E: It is? [00:11:40] Speaker D: Yes. [00:11:41] Speaker C: More people. More people need to do it. [00:11:42] Speaker E: Real therapy. [00:11:44] Speaker D: Yeah. You should go see a real therapist. [00:11:46] Speaker E: Please. [00:11:46] Speaker D: There's no replacement for a real therapist. [00:11:48] Speaker E: A lot of people just do podcasts. [00:11:49] Speaker C: And some people that podcast need a real therapist. [00:11:52] Speaker D: Yes. Especially the angry ones. [00:11:54] Speaker E: How have you all been? [00:11:58] Speaker D: I've been good. Blessed, highly favored. [00:12:01] Speaker E: All right. [00:12:01] Speaker D: You know what I'm saying? I'm discovering things. [00:12:04] Speaker E: What are you discovering? [00:12:07] Speaker D: No, not necessarily myself, but I was recently made aware that apparently drinking white milk in public is worse than drinking alcohol in public. Yes. [00:12:23] Speaker E: Why? [00:12:24] Speaker D: Who told you? A young white girl told me there was no nutritional value in white milk. I said, listen, ma'am, I drink whole milk. And she was sort of, kind of being funny, but she was like, why would you drink the milk of a cow? I said, because I like milk. I said, you drink things that are processed, are made. She had two teleports in her hand. [00:12:50] Speaker E: Wow. [00:12:51] Speaker D: And I was like, so it's more acceptable for you to drink these than me to drink milk? She was like, it's like one of the worst things you can do. [00:13:01] Speaker E: Well, it's plus a drug. [00:13:05] Speaker D: I can't say that as a non drinker. It is because it's offensive to people. [00:13:09] Speaker B: No, it really is. It's a drug. [00:13:10] Speaker D: Oh, I agree. I just don't say it because I don't drink. And when you don't do something people like, well, you don't know about it. [00:13:16] Speaker B: Okay, I drink. It is a drug. [00:13:18] Speaker D: It is a drug. But drinking white milk is a little more disrespectful. [00:13:23] Speaker E: I mean, I drink almond milk, but teaches them I ain't going to come into somebody drink. I mean, you were drinking a whole glass of milk out in broad daylight. [00:13:30] Speaker D: Though, as a while. [00:13:32] Speaker E: That's a little serial killer. [00:13:33] Speaker D: Well, I had. It is a little weird. Okay, but hold on. [00:13:37] Speaker E: Now. [00:13:38] Speaker D: This is who I do preferences with. I went in the gas station. Not a very good gas station either. [00:13:42] Speaker E: Okay. [00:13:43] Speaker D: Very low quality. [00:13:44] Speaker E: There's the Taylor port. [00:13:45] Speaker D: Yes. And I have four Oreos left out of a ten pack. [00:13:49] Speaker E: Oh, I understand this. [00:13:51] Speaker D: Okay. I just cracked it open before I got to the car. But I was literally 10ft from the car and she popped in front of me like a genie or something. I'm like, what? [00:14:01] Speaker E: Whoa, she's trying to flirt with you. [00:14:03] Speaker D: No, definitely not. [00:14:06] Speaker B: Was she pink? [00:14:07] Speaker D: Women don't like me. [00:14:08] Speaker B: Was she pink? [00:14:09] Speaker D: Only one woman likes me. [00:14:10] Speaker B: Only when you. [00:14:10] Speaker E: Was she pink? [00:14:12] Speaker D: Was she pink? [00:14:13] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:14:13] Speaker D: No, she was like a college white girl who might have, like, she might have a black lives matter stick on the back of her car. I feel. [00:14:22] Speaker E: Oh, liberal. [00:14:22] Speaker D: Okay, a little liberal. Her shoes were dirty. That's about right. [00:14:27] Speaker E: So she had to be like what they call. [00:14:29] Speaker B: I asked, was she pink? Meaning was she white? [00:14:31] Speaker C: But you said it. [00:14:36] Speaker B: What? [00:14:37] Speaker D: I don't want to continue my bigoted ways in 2024, so I'm trying to. [00:14:41] Speaker E: Reflect, keeping up with the resolution. Okay. [00:14:46] Speaker D: Yes. I'm trying not to be as heavy into it. When you said it made me feel good and I was like, oh, that's that old feeling. So I had to reject, I thought, to hit you with a barrage of pink, white, Caucasian. Yeah. And I was like, no, he didn't. [00:15:01] Speaker C: Say get thee behind yesterday. He said, don't say get deep behind me. Get from around me. [00:15:05] Speaker D: Oh, get from around me, Satan. Yes, but it was. You was trying to leave me there. And I was like, no, I'm not doing this. Yes. [00:15:17] Speaker C: I tried yesterday to do not to look your way. [00:15:21] Speaker D: What is that? Oh, yeah. [00:15:25] Speaker E: I don't like inside jokes. [00:15:28] Speaker D: We're at a funeral and a dear brother of ours. [00:15:33] Speaker C: Yeah. [00:15:36] Speaker D: It'S kind of like man code. I've only been caught like this once. Well, I almost got caught yesterday, too. Yeah, you did. With one of our players. Because it was a coach. And I looked at him and he still was crying and I felt it swelling up. I had to turn away. I did not cry, but I felt the swell. [00:15:55] Speaker E: It was hot. [00:15:56] Speaker D: No, I had to tilt my head back. [00:15:58] Speaker B: You do have emotions. [00:16:00] Speaker C: You should have seen, like, really. [00:16:02] Speaker D: But I was really not trying to look at nobody, like on our row. I was like, it was a row of us. [00:16:07] Speaker C: Everybody doing this straight. Because I looked over, I think I might have looked over at DJ. DJ was, like, writing his little thing, and I saw his eyes kind of do a little. [00:16:20] Speaker D: When that video came. [00:16:22] Speaker C: What, because the video came on of him saying, life is short. [00:16:26] Speaker D: Oh, yeah. [00:16:28] Speaker C: Because he survived cancer a couple of times. [00:16:30] Speaker D: Three times. [00:16:31] Speaker C: Three times. [00:16:31] Speaker D: Survived cancer. [00:16:32] Speaker B: Wow. [00:16:32] Speaker C: And so it was American Cancer association. He had did a video. [00:16:35] Speaker D: I didn't even know he did a video. [00:16:36] Speaker C: He did a video. Nobody knew he did this video. And so they played it at his funeral. So, like, literally, you can see everybody in. Almost everybody in that arena went. [00:16:45] Speaker D: They almost lost it. [00:16:47] Speaker B: You're supposed to be collecting emotions. [00:16:51] Speaker D: I didn't even finish watching the rest of the video. [00:16:54] Speaker E: I don't do funeral. [00:16:55] Speaker D: And then. Oh, you don't? [00:16:56] Speaker C: Tay was over there to the left of me, and Tay kept trying to play it off. So Tay would, like, one tear would go like this. [00:17:04] Speaker D: I'm sorry. I thought this was my mic saying I was turning. I don't know why I thought that was my mic stand. [00:17:14] Speaker C: You kept doing this, kept moving it back. [00:17:16] Speaker D: Yeah, I thought it was mine. I'm sorry. No, I'm sorry. [00:17:23] Speaker E: To make me do over here. [00:17:26] Speaker D: I didn't know that was your mic stand adjustment. [00:17:28] Speaker C: No, we got the camera. [00:17:30] Speaker D: Okay. [00:17:30] Speaker C: So Tay would use the paper and start fanning his face. [00:17:35] Speaker D: He would. I think it was getting bad. I think it was getting bad. Yeah. [00:17:39] Speaker C: I told a story about one time. [00:17:40] Speaker D: He locked eyes and he lost it. Levitated towards my friend, me. And this man was hugging. We was, like, 50ft away. We was hugging. I don't remember taking a step. [00:17:51] Speaker E: Nobody needed that. [00:17:52] Speaker D: I'm not doing that. No more control. I was wild. I was wild. [00:17:58] Speaker B: He was expressing your emotions. I'm so proud. [00:18:00] Speaker D: But I didn't even feel myself. [00:18:03] Speaker E: Because you let it build up so. [00:18:05] Speaker B: Much that you were just light out. You don't know. [00:18:08] Speaker D: I don't want that. [00:18:09] Speaker B: You were just floating at that point. [00:18:11] Speaker E: Let yourself cry a little bit along the way. Express your emotions. [00:18:16] Speaker D: Okay. [00:18:16] Speaker E: It won't be so bad when your. [00:18:17] Speaker B: Soft side came out. [00:18:19] Speaker D: Okay, but this is my thing about crying. Are you crying because you want to cry or crying because you're sad? Because I can't cry. I can't make myself cry. I don't believe so. If you can make yourself cry, couldn't you just cry and, like, pre cry in advance? [00:18:33] Speaker E: I mean, crying could help some people make themselves cry, right? [00:18:38] Speaker C: No, I don't think actors. I think people who want sympathy sometimes they can make themselves. They could put themselves in a place mentally where it causes. [00:18:46] Speaker E: As a form of manipulation. [00:18:48] Speaker C: As a form of manipulation. [00:18:49] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:18:50] Speaker C: Women, men, too. [00:18:56] Speaker B: I can tell you a scene, let's not do that on real world, where a black guy went in the bathroom, thought about something, made himself cry, and came out and had a girl feeling sorry for him. I want to say that was season, maybe four. [00:19:14] Speaker C: Is it real world? [00:19:15] Speaker B: Yes. [00:19:15] Speaker D: That was a while ago. But let me ask you this. Was he just trying to get some or get out of something? [00:19:20] Speaker B: He's trying to get out of something. [00:19:21] Speaker D: So he might have to do that. He was being manipulative. That's not right. I guess guys can't do it. [00:19:28] Speaker E: I'm back at the point where I'm confused on whether, you know what I'm saying, whether you feel like you need to make yourself cry or whether it's response to an emotion. What is bad about that if it's not manipulative? [00:19:42] Speaker C: I think for a good portion of the people, I think very few cry because of their sad, or it's an emotion puts them in that place. Some people do it to get out of things or to get people to do things. [00:19:58] Speaker E: Or sometimes it's not that deep. Sometimes people just aren't emotionally mature or regulated. [00:20:04] Speaker C: Sometimes they cry emotionally irregulated. [00:20:06] Speaker E: Right. [00:20:06] Speaker C: Okay. [00:20:07] Speaker E: Sometimes they just. You know what I'm saying? People don't know how to handle responses. It's the same way, like, a lot of men default to anger than any other emotion. Some women might default to crying when they get overwhelmed. [00:20:18] Speaker B: They don't know. [00:20:18] Speaker C: I can't do no whole bunch control. [00:20:19] Speaker B: Their emotions, cry when they are mad. [00:20:23] Speaker E: I had an ex who used to. [00:20:24] Speaker C: Cry, a guy, frequently. [00:20:30] Speaker D: That's got to be kind of draining, right? [00:20:32] Speaker E: I mean, I would talk and be like, what are you crying for? You know what I'm saying? [00:20:35] Speaker D: Not being you would talk to him like that. [00:20:38] Speaker E: Yes. It's other things that happen on this side of the world, too. We experience things like that. [00:20:43] Speaker D: I think that's why we have platforms like this to experience that. But I thought, like, men get two cries a year. You get one by yourself. Well, second to women. To me, you get one to yourself, and you can get one in front. [00:20:57] Speaker E: Of them based on your idea of, like, you know, how you understand manhood. But there's a lot of different versions of manhood. Womanhood and what people I'm with Cl don, that I know. [00:21:09] Speaker C: I don't think as a man, I can outwardly just be crying. Just like you said about the guy said that he cried frequently. [00:21:14] Speaker B: You psychiat but he might have some emotional battles he's battling. [00:21:18] Speaker E: He wasn't emotionally regulated. So it's just like. [00:21:21] Speaker C: And that's what I'm saying. [00:21:22] Speaker D: And so you broke up with him. Wow. [00:21:26] Speaker C: Left him on the street. [00:21:27] Speaker D: That's humanizing. [00:21:29] Speaker E: Did I say that? Did I say that? [00:21:33] Speaker D: Sound like another one bites to dust. [00:21:35] Speaker C: It don't sound like. [00:21:39] Speaker E: I have no problem with a man expressing his emotions. [00:21:42] Speaker B: I can express my emotions without regulated. [00:21:45] Speaker D: What you mean, regulated? [00:21:46] Speaker E: But the thing is, when you are trying to keep yourself from crying, like, not looking at your friends and wanting to feel the emotion that you're already feeling. [00:21:55] Speaker C: I feel the emotion. I just want to do it without the crying. [00:21:57] Speaker E: Okay. And that's. You're forcing yourself to feel. [00:22:01] Speaker B: Right. [00:22:01] Speaker E: That's still a suppression. I feel like there's two extremes. I don't want you to be overly emotional, but I also don't want you to be so closed off to your own emotions either. [00:22:10] Speaker D: But a woman doesn't have any. She doesn't have any restraint on when she can do it and when she can't do it. Or you want a man to have control. Women get to have free rein. [00:22:23] Speaker E: I'm not saying that some women don't overuse that. I've seen plenty of people. I'm like, what? [00:22:27] Speaker D: You crying? I agree, but it's not frowned upon. It's not anything. And I think women should hold each other more accountable. [00:22:35] Speaker E: We do. The whole world holds a lot of women accountable. But that wasn't the point we was making. Okay, I'm confused how we got there. [00:22:44] Speaker D: I was prepared just in case you all tried something slick and trying to double back anyway. Yes. Go ahead, tell us more. [00:22:59] Speaker E: Tell you more about what? [00:23:00] Speaker D: What you were talking about before we got a little, slightly derailed. [00:23:04] Speaker E: What was I talking about? Remind me. [00:23:06] Speaker D: You were saying that men have to regulate somewhat, a little bit, regulate their emotions. [00:23:14] Speaker E: I'm not going to just put that on men as people. You know what I'm saying? People need to regulate whether we're talking about the person that cries because they want to be manipulative or the person that suppresses their emotions because they don't want to look vulnerable or feel vulnerable or look soft, like balance. That's what I'm saying. [00:23:31] Speaker C: I just don't want to be out there crying. [00:23:33] Speaker E: Why? It's not a good feeling. And I'm somebody who, like, I'm sensitive, but I don't usually cry in front of a lot of people either, but. [00:23:42] Speaker B: Do you cry alone? [00:23:44] Speaker C: Me? [00:23:44] Speaker E: Yeah, in the shower. [00:23:46] Speaker C: No. [00:23:47] Speaker B: Sliding down the wall. I'm going down. [00:23:54] Speaker E: No, that was in sync. [00:23:56] Speaker D: That happens. You never seen it like in movies or shows, especially shows that have caucasian women in them. They have like, scenes like that. Especially early ninety s. The Caucus. Yeah, caucus mountains. [00:24:11] Speaker B: But really he fell right into it. [00:24:13] Speaker D: Yeah, but that's supposed to be true. [00:24:18] Speaker C: Now, something that we're going to find out if it's true is the Fraser Allen Allen theory. [00:24:26] Speaker D: Where do we start? Because I have. [00:24:31] Speaker C: Fraser Allen Allen. And it says this is when a person that you want doesn't want you, but the person that wants you, you don't want. And you create this cycle. [00:24:50] Speaker E: Tell you. [00:24:50] Speaker B: It'S something very common. [00:24:52] Speaker C: You create this cycle that continues on. Because when the person doesn't want you, the person that's wanted you and continues to pursue you, you eventually end up with them. But then onto a point where you see somebody else that you want, then you move on to that person and dump the person that you. But I didn't want in the first place. [00:25:12] Speaker B: Thought it was the person that doesn't want you. You treat the person that does want you the way the person that doesn't want you treats you. [00:25:22] Speaker D: That was my understanding. I think he did the Ethan Allen theory. [00:25:27] Speaker C: No, I just went with the. [00:25:29] Speaker D: I thought the Alan Allen theory was. Yeah, so Fraser Alan Allen. [00:25:33] Speaker C: No, they say that part. I left that part out, so my apologies. [00:25:37] Speaker B: It feels like it's part of it. [00:25:39] Speaker C: Yeah, that's a part of it. But then they said when you. So explain it. Because I guess my explanation was a little. [00:25:45] Speaker E: No, yours was good. It's just when she got to hers, I was like, okay, I was following and I got lost. Say it one more time. [00:25:50] Speaker B: Okay, so the person that I want, that doesn't want me mistreats me. Okay, so the person that actually wants me, I treat them like the person that I want. [00:26:01] Speaker E: I got you. Treats me. [00:26:02] Speaker B: Okay, so it's a cycle. And he said it is. Usually one person is blind in a whole dynamic. [00:26:10] Speaker D: They also call that childhood trauma. Same thing. [00:26:14] Speaker C: Now that we got the definition here. [00:26:16] Speaker D: What was your question about that? [00:26:20] Speaker C: You got a question? [00:26:21] Speaker D: Isn't that just what people do? We kind of treat people how we've been treated for the most part. [00:26:30] Speaker C: We project, then that's the trauma projected on somebody else. [00:26:32] Speaker D: It's not always trauma. It's even when you're having good relationships with people. [00:26:38] Speaker C: Okay. [00:26:39] Speaker D: It's not just we don't. [00:26:40] Speaker C: It doesn't always have to be. [00:26:42] Speaker D: No, it doesn't have to be like a negative thing at all. [00:26:44] Speaker C: It could be a positive thing. [00:26:45] Speaker D: Thought we just treat people the way we've been treated and I guess we've been treated differently being raised and then in relationships and friendships. [00:26:57] Speaker E: Or you could treat people the way you want to be treated, too. That's always an option. You know what I'm saying? [00:27:02] Speaker D: No, I think that's the logical thing. But these theories do have some bases. I believe what you believe. [00:27:11] Speaker B: Okay. [00:27:11] Speaker D: But most people don't operate like that. [00:27:13] Speaker E: No, I definitely understand the theory and I know a lot of people do it, but it's just that the reason why I giggled is because I thought about. And Nick, you will notice that guy that you don't give no time to, but he always going to hit you up every so often, check on you. You know what saying? Like, you got a couple of them he won't kill. And it's just like, you'll let him know, like, I'm not interested, but he don't go know. So it's just like, I could give some attention to that guy and try to get whatever I want from him because the guy I want is not available. But it takes a lot of maturity to be like, no, I'm not going to mess with that person because I'm not able to get what I want. [00:27:51] Speaker C: But then my question would be to that, why don't you just let them? Of course, you probably articulated that to them. But then why not distance yourself from it and just don't answer the calls? Don't answer the text messages? Don't respond. [00:28:04] Speaker B: Right. [00:28:04] Speaker C: If that's the case, because I think the thing that keeps them going is you keep. [00:28:08] Speaker B: No, men are persistent, regardless, not just Mendy talk. [00:28:16] Speaker C: Okay. [00:28:21] Speaker D: Tell him big. Why? [00:28:22] Speaker E: Tell him, boy. [00:28:23] Speaker D: Summer, tell him. No, I'm just saying, like, on his body. Tell him. [00:28:28] Speaker C: Women do the same thing. [00:28:30] Speaker B: Women do do the same thing. [00:28:32] Speaker C: Women. [00:28:32] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:28:32] Speaker C: I think that you can articulate yourself. [00:28:35] Speaker B: To the best of your ability that you're not interested. [00:28:38] Speaker E: Right. And like you said, distance yourself. I actually agree with that. I was just having a conversation with a friend and he was saying, like, how he wouldn't be serious with the woman that he was talking to and everything, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, just leave her alone. She don't want to. Let me let you leave her alone. [00:28:55] Speaker D: Women don't find that attractive. [00:28:58] Speaker E: Find what is attractive when you want. [00:28:59] Speaker D: To be in a relationship with them. [00:29:02] Speaker E: If you meet a man throwing haymakers out here. [00:29:05] Speaker D: No, I'm not. Kay, listen, when a man pursues a relationship like, I want you to be my girlfriend. [00:29:13] Speaker C: That's not. [00:29:14] Speaker D: Women kind of avoid him. Because women. We're just talking women and men because there's already no out. [00:29:23] Speaker E: What kind of women are we talking about? [00:29:25] Speaker D: We're talking about a woman. [00:29:26] Speaker C: I think the majority of women. [00:29:27] Speaker B: Well, let him finish. [00:29:29] Speaker D: Okay. Thank you, Nick. Sorry. Women want. What do women want? [00:29:38] Speaker C: More. [00:29:38] Speaker D: Okay. All right. So in my theory, when a man wants a woman too much, it's an automatic disqualification of that man, and she. [00:29:51] Speaker B: Starts to disrespect him. [00:29:53] Speaker D: Well, especially if she feels like she can just have her way. So a woman is supposed to give you choosing signals, and then you're supposed to respond to those choosing signals. But when you're just like, I want you the love of my life, queen earth guy. [00:30:07] Speaker E: That's a lot. That's a lot. [00:30:10] Speaker D: Go ahead. But I'm saying you do usually reject that because that sounds like he's crazy. [00:30:16] Speaker B: You're not wrong. But those are just the type of women those type of men pick. [00:30:22] Speaker D: Oh, that could be a true thing, too. Well, no, I wouldn't agree with that. [00:30:26] Speaker B: And the only reason why I say that is because men like to chase. So you're chasing. Don't men like to chase? So you're chasing something that you know is mean. You know, it's disrespectful. You know how that woman is. She knows you like her. She knows you're safe. She settles for you. You worship the ground she walks on. And now your theory is women don't want men that are nice because they like men being mean to them. [00:31:03] Speaker D: No, that's not my theory. But I understand what you're saying. What I'm saying is if a man comes off too strongly and wants you to be his girlfriend, especially immediately, 2nd, 3rd date, to most women, that is a turn off. [00:31:16] Speaker E: I can tell you why, though. Because it makes you feel unsafe, at least for me. Sometimes if a guy is coming on that strong that early on, before you even had a chance to know me, it doesn't feel genuine. It feels like it's more about me being a prize or an accessory. [00:31:32] Speaker B: Love bomb. [00:31:32] Speaker E: Or it's a love bomb. And it's not really you wanting me for me. You want me for an aesthetic. [00:31:39] Speaker D: Because he don't even know you. [00:31:40] Speaker E: You don't know me yet. [00:31:41] Speaker B: You got to be my wife. [00:31:42] Speaker E: And so now I'm looking at is your self esteem and your self worth where it needs to be. Because I might not even be a good fit for you. I might not be compatible with you. What is it that is making you so. And especially when we start getting up. [00:31:53] Speaker B: In age, you're trying to give me something. [00:31:57] Speaker E: What is it that making you so immediate with this love or this attention and this want to be in a relationship with me before you even had a chance to see if I fit in your life in the right way. That's why it's not. [00:32:12] Speaker C: So basically what a man should do if they begin to have those feelings is not say anything. [00:32:20] Speaker E: No, I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is because it's going. [00:32:23] Speaker C: To come off disingenuous if you are. [00:32:26] Speaker E: Having those thoughts already. Let's say that you meet a girl out and you all start talking, and at the end of the week, you're just like, oh, my God. I think you the one that's a little too soon. [00:32:35] Speaker C: Saying you're the one might be a. [00:32:36] Speaker E: Little bit too soon. That was kind of the example. [00:32:41] Speaker D: I. [00:32:41] Speaker C: Think, saying that you would like to pursue something more or whatever, that's fine. [00:32:47] Speaker E: Right? You should have the intentionality talk. I'm not saying don't be honest in your communication. Like, if we're talking and we're trying to get to know each other and your goal is to date so that you can end up in a relationship, please tell me that, because my goal might be something else, that's fine. But if you're on the level where he's just like, he's making this person. You texted me, good morning, queen. Every morning you giving me four or five calls. [00:33:10] Speaker B: Hey, wifey. [00:33:11] Speaker E: Why you didn't answer my call? I missed you. Some people call you Bae after three days of texting. That's too much. It feels like sexual harassment. Unattractive. Because it's not genuine. And you don't know me well enough for me to be anything other than a stranger that you're getting to know, it's fine that you're attracted. It's fine that you think I'm cool. But is this going to last for as long as it needs to, or is it just that limerance that a lot of people have been talking about? [00:33:40] Speaker B: Yeah, like, good morning, baby, and you don't even know my last name. [00:33:44] Speaker E: Still don't know. [00:33:48] Speaker D: Because I was about to say. You said, don't do that. [00:33:52] Speaker C: Don't do what? [00:33:53] Speaker D: The example you gave. [00:33:55] Speaker C: Which one? [00:33:56] Speaker D: Just a second ago. [00:33:58] Speaker C: So you're saying not to do that? [00:34:00] Speaker E: No, don't be honest. No, I feel like it's a way to do it. Like I just said, you can have the intentionality listen to me. [00:34:09] Speaker C: I'll just say, have you all been. [00:34:12] Speaker E: There before where you were dating a woman and you felt immediately connected to her and you had to make a choice whether to let her know or to wait until you felt it was more appropriate? [00:34:23] Speaker B: No, I would say, wait. [00:34:25] Speaker E: How did you handle it? [00:34:26] Speaker D: Okay, you let him go because it. [00:34:30] Speaker C: Happened twice and I handled. And the first time, they got the wrong response. I got the wrong response. It was that type of thing where I think she ends up ghosting me after that conversation. [00:34:47] Speaker E: I didn't expect that. [00:34:50] Speaker C: So I was like, okay, well, I won't do that again. [00:34:53] Speaker E: Right? That was a good answer, though. [00:34:55] Speaker C: And then the second time, the response, I didn't have a response. I didn't get a response card. I didn't say anything. And then we ended up maybe weeks down the line in the conversation of, I don't think that you're being intentional about me. And I was like. [00:35:14] Speaker D: What did you. [00:35:15] Speaker B: Tell that person, the person that ghost you, when did you tell them your feelings? How many dates in how many conversations? [00:35:24] Speaker C: We had a lot of dates in a short period of time. It might be about three weeks in. There's a lot of dates in a short period of time, a lot of phone time. And it wasn't just me calling like that. It was reciprocated. [00:35:37] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:35:39] Speaker C: I think I try to do a good job. I don't always win, but I think I try to do a good job. [00:35:43] Speaker B: Question feeling things out, because I don't want you to feel like that was your fault. You weren't a bad person for letting that person know how you felt in that moment. And we do get caught up in, like, when we meet somebody and we're starting to spend a lot of time with them consistently, every day, all day. It's okay for you to feel the way you feel and tell her she was in a room. [00:36:05] Speaker E: At least she could have communicated her discomfort with the speed at which things. [00:36:10] Speaker C: Because I think that's the issue I have, and that's the issue I have with ghosting period. I understand people got to do what's best for them, but I think sometimes we continue these cycles because people aren't informed of what they're doing sometimes. [00:36:24] Speaker E: Right. [00:36:25] Speaker C: So, like, if I'm doing something, if I came off in my articulation of my feelings, if I came off strong or made you uncomfortable or whatever, if you don't tell, tell me, I guess what I did wrong, in a sense, to make you feel said way, then I'm going to continue to attack, do it each other situation that I'm in. And even though you may not be interested because we're in this place, you may be able to break a little bit of a cycle in that, in me. And it could be, however you got to deal with it, you deal with it. And I think that that's kind of the conundrum we find ourselves in, is people are allowed to do whatever they want to do because they don't owe you anything. And I get it. [00:37:07] Speaker E: I don't necessarily believe that. [00:37:10] Speaker B: I still think you're owed some type of courtesy. [00:37:13] Speaker C: Well, it's courtesy, it's not owed. So it would be nice if you did it, but you really don't owe. [00:37:19] Speaker E: It maturity if the person does it and it shows a level of empathy, regardless of whether they have a romantic connection with you or not. I feel like the reason why that probably went the way it went is because you got an answer sooner than you anticipated. You didn't spend no more time on this person, thankfully so. [00:37:37] Speaker D: But didn't you press up? What, you mean you pressed up on. [00:37:41] Speaker E: The woman like you were still pursuing her afterwards? [00:37:45] Speaker D: No, like you came on too strong to start with. [00:37:48] Speaker C: No, I don't think that was the case. Everything was reciprocated. So whatever. Not everything. Let's say like today, I would call tomorrow if I'm busy or whatever, she would be the one to call me first. Hey, you didn't call me today. [00:38:06] Speaker D: It's not reciprocation. [00:38:07] Speaker B: Yeah, that's just her being used to a routine. You went off the routine. [00:38:14] Speaker C: I'm just saying, it's not like it was a one way street where I'm always calling, I'm always texting. It wasn't a beratment of things from. [00:38:21] Speaker E: Me, and it wasn't attention you was giving her until you got serious. [00:38:25] Speaker B: I was about to say, and that's what it was like. Now, being a woman that's been on the other side of that. [00:38:31] Speaker D: You see, what you say, you didn't read the sign. [00:38:33] Speaker C: There was no sign. [00:38:35] Speaker B: There were plenty of signs, but you didn't see it because you actually liked her. You being selfish and. No, he wasn't being selfish. [00:38:41] Speaker D: He liked her too much. [00:38:43] Speaker C: No, now that's selfish. [00:38:44] Speaker E: No. [00:38:45] Speaker B: Erico going into the not like her too much. He liked her and she didn't like him. [00:38:50] Speaker D: Well, see, this is. [00:38:51] Speaker B: I agree, he was a good time. [00:38:53] Speaker E: But you was the guy on the other. [00:38:55] Speaker D: My friend's not a floozy. [00:38:59] Speaker E: Sometimes you have to accept that. [00:39:00] Speaker D: We can wait till he leaves the room before we discuss that. Not right in front of conversation with you. [00:39:06] Speaker E: Funny, because you always end up in. [00:39:08] Speaker D: The hot seat scl doing all. [00:39:12] Speaker B: But realistically, you were just a good time. And that's why I say it was nothing you did wrong. [00:39:21] Speaker C: I do like being a good time. [00:39:23] Speaker B: You liked her, and you thought she was doing everything that you were doing, too. And, no, she just liked the routine. And when you went off your routine, it was like, okay, I don't have him. Like, I need to have him. I need his attention. [00:39:38] Speaker E: Did you have the talk about why you all were pursuing each other or dating before it got to that point? Or was that the first point where you really had a deep discussion about? [00:39:47] Speaker C: That was the first time we got into a real discussion about. Because we didn't even have sex, so that wasn't even a part of red flag. [00:39:57] Speaker D: Wow. [00:39:58] Speaker C: No, that was Nick Cruz. [00:40:05] Speaker E: Three weeks. [00:40:07] Speaker C: No, let me say this. I think that was the first time, and this is years ago, but I think that was the first time I ever was very intentional about not falling into a physical situation too soon. So there was points where it could have. And it was like, okay, you might need to go home, or I need to go or whatever, because I went through a little point where I was like, look, I'm not about to do this, because getting out after you did that is difficult. If stuff don't work out, it's difficult to get out. Yes, it is. [00:40:48] Speaker B: My boyfriend, he said he was like, man, when are we about to start having sex? [00:40:54] Speaker D: I'm just so romantic. [00:40:56] Speaker C: Yeah, that's the way to put it. [00:40:58] Speaker B: It was serious, though. I made him wait. [00:41:03] Speaker D: I know you did. Neat. Because I know you run a tight ship. [00:41:07] Speaker B: No. [00:41:09] Speaker D: Yes, you do. [00:41:10] Speaker B: But he was cool. [00:41:11] Speaker E: He was cool. [00:41:12] Speaker B: I didn't know if I wanted to be in a relationship. [00:41:15] Speaker D: Well, see, the reason I say you missed the signs is because a woman will let you know when she's ready to be in a relationship. And you know how she does that. [00:41:23] Speaker E: I think a woman has to know herself to be able to be able to communicate that, even nonverbally. And that's not always the case. [00:41:32] Speaker D: Don't do it nonverbally with me. [00:41:34] Speaker E: I'm just saying. I get what you're saying. You know what I'm saying. There's nonverbal cues and stuff that you can pick up on. But when they say, believe that he was in a situation where he really thought, especially if you all didn't have that conversation up front, that you all was on the same page, the vibes and everything were there. And then you tell her how she feels and she's like, oh, this too much for me. [00:41:55] Speaker B: What made him feel like we were here? [00:41:57] Speaker E: Right. [00:41:57] Speaker B: Because the vibes. [00:42:03] Speaker E: Can be manipulated, which is true. I could date somebody and make them feel like they're the most special person in the world and I'm just having a good time. So it's just like having that. Yeah. Having that talk and having people that I realized were getting a little bit more serious about me than I was going to be about them. Have that talk early, be like, listen, I feel like we need to take a break. It's your choice whether you want to have a friendship, but I know that's not what you want at this point, so I'm going to have to back away because sometimes you have to protect people from their own bad decisions, too. [00:42:35] Speaker C: The thing I respect about that is the conversation that you have. [00:42:38] Speaker E: It took me a while to get there because you know what? Being like I said, becoming a mature person and wanting to give that empathy to other people, it takes some time to develop that, especially having been on the other side. I was the first Allen. No, the Fraser. [00:42:52] Speaker D: Fraser. Alan Allen. [00:42:54] Speaker E: I was Frasier before Frasier, you know what I'm saying? And I was the first Allen and I was the last know. So it's like being at those different points and whatever dating phase you're in and whatever age you get to learn. [00:43:05] Speaker D: How to K. Allen. Allen. [00:43:08] Speaker E: Wow. [00:43:09] Speaker D: Okay. I got lost. Okay. [00:43:12] Speaker B: Meaning she's been in all dynamics of the situation. [00:43:16] Speaker D: Yes. [00:43:17] Speaker E: You said that she's been in all positions. [00:43:21] Speaker D: You self missed the sign. [00:43:23] Speaker E: What sign did he miss? [00:43:25] Speaker D: Because you're kind of giving him bad advice. But it's good advice. But it's bad advice. [00:43:28] Speaker B: He didn't miss a lot of signs. [00:43:30] Speaker D: This is how you know he had. [00:43:31] Speaker B: Signs because he didn't see them. [00:43:33] Speaker D: Well, you put yourself in such a position that she has to inquire about you. [00:43:39] Speaker C: Okay. [00:43:39] Speaker D: And she has to say, what are we doing? Because I'm having too good of a time. What are we doing? [00:43:44] Speaker E: This was a conversation that was had. [00:43:46] Speaker C: No, I didn't say that. [00:43:48] Speaker D: This is the vibe you said, this. [00:43:49] Speaker C: Is the vibe you said. [00:43:50] Speaker D: This is the vibe you said you're going to have the best time in your life right here with me on the phone in person. When we're talking. Don't ask her no question. She will let you know. What are we doing? Who else are you talking to? Because they ready now. [00:44:02] Speaker E: I kind of agree. [00:44:04] Speaker B: You're right. Where are we going with this exactly? [00:44:08] Speaker E: Because I'm going to ask. [00:44:10] Speaker D: Once the woman asks, then. [00:44:15] Speaker C: I got a caveat to it. [00:44:16] Speaker D: Okay. [00:44:18] Speaker C: We didn't talk about being with each other, but through conversation early on, she said that when she dates, she's only dating one person. And the person that she's dating, she expects them to only be dating her, not a relationship or anything. But she says that's the way she deals with it. And if that's not what I want to do, then that's cool question. [00:44:40] Speaker B: So when you all had that conversation, did you have that conversation in the middle, beginning or end. [00:44:49] Speaker C: 20 years ago? [00:44:50] Speaker D: Jesus Christ. [00:44:52] Speaker B: No. Because it's a point to that. If I'm talking to a guy, if I'm dating a guy and he tells me, oh, well, when I get in. [00:45:01] Speaker E: A relationship, it's a general thing. I'm not thanking you. [00:45:04] Speaker B: Yeah. Wait a minute. [00:45:07] Speaker D: It could be in general. [00:45:08] Speaker C: Well, she didn't say no, she did not say in a relationship. She said in the dating phase. And that's different than being in a. [00:45:14] Speaker B: Relationship because my thing in a relationship. I'm just saying dating. If I'm dating you, to me, I want to get to a relationship. And you're telling me what you're going to do when you get in a relationship, and that's what we're trying to work on. I might not be the person that they're looking to be in a relationship with. [00:45:32] Speaker D: Well, he made a mistake, Nick. [00:45:34] Speaker B: That's why I'm asking you. When did y'all have that conversation? [00:45:37] Speaker D: Because I got a statement and clear both y'all up. Okay. [00:45:39] Speaker B: Okay. [00:45:40] Speaker D: First and foremost, do not listen to women about what they want. They don't know. [00:45:45] Speaker E: I do not. [00:45:45] Speaker D: They know it when they know it. But you might now they know it when they recognize it. Women literally do not know what they want because the person most people are dating. [00:45:57] Speaker E: Are we ventable? [00:45:58] Speaker D: No. [00:45:59] Speaker B: Everybody knows what they want till they get it. [00:46:01] Speaker D: That's true, too. [00:46:02] Speaker E: That's true either. Okay, with some things. But if you've been out here enough, you know what you want, what you need. [00:46:09] Speaker D: Well, just listen to theory, though. [00:46:10] Speaker B: Know what you don't want, but you know what you like. [00:46:13] Speaker D: Ideally, you know what you would like. I agree with that. But the person you're with is not the person you've always been thinking about your whole life. That's what I mean. [00:46:25] Speaker E: A lot of us, when it comes to dating, we're operating off of our own personal theories. [00:46:29] Speaker D: But I'm talking. [00:46:30] Speaker E: And then we get to test those theories when we get in connection with another person. [00:46:33] Speaker D: Correct. [00:46:35] Speaker E: For a podcast, it's not saying that we don't know what we want. We have a theory of what we want. [00:46:39] Speaker D: You're right. When I'm talking to my man, do not listen to them because they don't know you. Just go, need to go be that what I'm saying. But you are right. [00:46:52] Speaker B: That's why I asked. When did you have that conversation? [00:46:55] Speaker C: It was early. [00:46:55] Speaker D: You talk about maybe you kept listening to her. [00:46:58] Speaker E: So I think what she's trying to convey is a lot of times when we have those first seedings of conversations, it's general. I'm not specifically talking to the person across from me. [00:47:08] Speaker D: That's why you don't listen. [00:47:10] Speaker E: He's not the placeholder for, hey, when I'm dating this, this and that. And the third, she's thinking in general, not this person. But you operate it like she was talking about you. [00:47:21] Speaker C: Yes, I did. So not to say no, but yes, I did my distinction because I distinctly asked. I said, well, isn't that a form of a relationship because you're being exclusive to one person. [00:47:33] Speaker D: You said too much. [00:47:34] Speaker E: It's exclusive dating. Yeah, it's not a relationship. [00:47:37] Speaker C: And I said, if that's what you do, that's fine. [00:47:40] Speaker D: You said, do not listen to women. [00:47:42] Speaker B: You said, that's what you do. [00:47:43] Speaker C: If that's what you do, that's fine. [00:47:44] Speaker B: That's fine. [00:47:45] Speaker C: And I respected that fact and did not date. [00:47:49] Speaker D: They don't want to be anybody else. [00:47:51] Speaker E: So you felt like you had already adjusted that early on in pursuit of this person. [00:47:56] Speaker C: Because if we're spending all this time together and we're going on all these dates, am I not to assume that we are dating? [00:48:06] Speaker E: Have you never said anything since then? I'm sorry. [00:48:08] Speaker C: No, I haven't spoken to us. [00:48:10] Speaker B: I would say this because if you change the way you're dating for somebody else, because I always feel like when a person tells me, well, I don't like to date people that date multiple people at one time, I kind of feel like you're trying to manipulate me. [00:48:27] Speaker C: Well, let me say this. [00:48:28] Speaker D: Manipulate the situation. Yes. Yeah, I do agree with that. That's why you shouldn't listen to them. [00:48:34] Speaker C: I'm just telling you I don't agree with that. Because if you're dating with intention to be in something. [00:48:41] Speaker D: What? [00:48:41] Speaker C: And if you are, nobody is. [00:48:44] Speaker B: That's not true. But I have to see what my intentions are with each individual. Now, what's my attention. [00:48:49] Speaker C: So for me, I'm saying this for me, if I'm dating with the intention of being with somebody, and that's a general statement, and the person that I am currently dating or on a date with and really has piqued my interest, she says, this is how, when she's dating someone, this is how she does it. I respect that fact. That's an adjustment. That's not that egregious of an adjustment. [00:49:13] Speaker D: It's very egregious. [00:49:15] Speaker E: I feel like somebody is not. I get what you're saying. You proceed based on how they're going to be dating because that's the person you want. [00:49:24] Speaker D: A woman cannot tell you how to. [00:49:25] Speaker E: Get her if you don't hush. I agree with. [00:49:32] Speaker B: Seattle. [00:49:35] Speaker D: She don't know what it's to get her. [00:49:36] Speaker E: Go ahead. [00:49:37] Speaker C: Okay, so let's say this. Let's say I'm interested in her, right? She piqued my interest. I want to get to know more. I want to date her more. She said, hey, look, she only when she's dating, it's exclusive. That's the only way she does. [00:49:50] Speaker D: Yeah. Okay. No, your business what I'm doing at all. [00:49:54] Speaker B: It ain't. It ain't none of your business. But what I do with you out. [00:49:59] Speaker C: Of respect for the person and what they want. [00:50:02] Speaker E: Yeah. [00:50:03] Speaker B: Because if this is not what I want, it. [00:50:07] Speaker C: But I'm saying if this is not what I want, then let's say if I'm really interested in the person, but I go, hey, look, I'm not giving up dating other people for you. [00:50:14] Speaker D: Well, why would you tell her that? Men are supposed to lie to women. [00:50:22] Speaker B: Abortion. Abortion. [00:50:25] Speaker D: It is a dance. [00:50:26] Speaker B: No, but I get what you're saying. You respect. [00:50:29] Speaker E: Well coordinated dance of. [00:50:30] Speaker B: You are not going to date anybody else to let her know that you were serious about dating her. So you didn't date anybody else because. [00:50:38] Speaker D: She went and pursued the dude? No, she pursued the dude she thought he was. [00:50:42] Speaker E: Or she pursued the first Allen. [00:50:44] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:50:45] Speaker E: The one that she really wanted. [00:50:47] Speaker C: And that might be true. [00:50:48] Speaker E: All of us are placeholders for people. It hurts to be a placeholder, but some. [00:50:52] Speaker D: What? How can you be a placeholder? [00:50:54] Speaker E: Because you're just a good time. You're the person that is the excitement. You're giving that person the attention, the. [00:51:00] Speaker B: Time when I'm bored else. [00:51:01] Speaker E: But you're not necessarily the person that they want. Person that they want. They're now that person for that person. [00:51:08] Speaker D: Then that means to a man, not to a woman, because I'm out. Speak for women, but for a man, if you are a man placeholder, you're definitely not reading the woman. You're listening to what she's saying and trying to dictate what she said. Call in response to, okay, she likes a man who cook, not cook. She like a man who drive white car, not got a white car. All that is lies, just absolute lies. You need to be the man you are and let her like you for who you are. That's the only way you can enter to a relationship. You cannot be what people want you to be. [00:51:41] Speaker E: Right? [00:51:42] Speaker D: I am not my girlfriend's dream guy, but I am her dream guy. [00:51:45] Speaker C: See, but I think that, yes, in the sense, if you want to talk about stuff like that, then, yeah, you shouldn't change yourself or what you do. [00:51:52] Speaker D: Because what you're saying is. Right. What you're saying is what you was trying to do for her. If that was true, there would be no divorce. There'll be no cheating. Anything else. [00:52:00] Speaker C: What do you mean? [00:52:01] Speaker D: What? You tried to accommodate what she was telling you. Let me address her first. Okay. A marathon starts with one step. [00:52:18] Speaker E: Okay? If you have that thought process when it comes to being in a relationship or connection with anybody, you're never going to change. Change needs to happen at some point. For some things. It's the same way that I can be out here and be like, hey, I'm dating. And I let the guys know that I'm dating and it is their choice whether or not they want to pursue still dating me in that capacity. [00:52:38] Speaker D: Okay, I understand that. But he should make no adjustment based upon what you said at all. It doesn't matter. [00:52:46] Speaker E: He asks. I feel like that's the problem. [00:52:49] Speaker D: She got you talking to yourself. [00:52:51] Speaker E: He asked himself, hey, is this something I feel comfortable with doing in pursuit of this woman? He got his answer. He adjusted and pursued her. [00:52:59] Speaker D: That's the problem. [00:53:00] Speaker B: But he did it because he liked her, right? He didn't do it because it was a good. [00:53:04] Speaker D: He didn't do it because he thought it was the right thing. [00:53:06] Speaker B: He did it mainly because he thought. [00:53:07] Speaker E: It was the wrong thing. [00:53:08] Speaker C: No, but I think that what's going on here is it's a matter of her saying something to me and then me reacting to it, which is what you're saying. Okay. But I see it more as her saying, this is my boundary. These are my boundaries of what I do. Don't we all say that you should express your boundary. [00:53:29] Speaker D: Hold a second. [00:53:29] Speaker C: And you should discussion. [00:53:31] Speaker D: You should. [00:53:32] Speaker C: When you're getting to know people, you're right. [00:53:35] Speaker D: But you haven't got to the point where your boundaries needed to be a conversation. It's no boundaries. You owe me nothing. I owe you nothing? [00:53:43] Speaker E: When you're dating somebody. [00:53:45] Speaker D: They weren't dating, they were just on the phone. [00:53:47] Speaker E: It doesn't hold up what time of. [00:53:49] Speaker D: The stage they were at. [00:53:50] Speaker E: We can say on a blanket statement like, you don't owe nobody anything. You don't have to adjust anything, especially when you're dating. How far are you going to get with their logic? [00:53:58] Speaker D: Well, hold on. You can get to the top, trust me. [00:54:00] Speaker E: And what kind of person are you going to be when you get there? What kind of relationship are you going to have? I say this. [00:54:05] Speaker B: This is how I'm looking at. This is how I'm taking it because you all are getting really deep with it. I take it. [00:54:11] Speaker C: I like deep conversation. [00:54:13] Speaker B: It's not about deep conversation. It's about someone told you, this is how I date. And in order for you to be with me, this is how I date. And you adjusted yourself to make sure you were able to date them. That's the problem. Because you adjusted yourself when they came and said, this is the only way you're going to be able to date me. Yeah, she said, that's how I'm taking. [00:54:38] Speaker D: Me cooking right now. [00:54:39] Speaker C: I'm not taking, yeah, she's not cooking with grease. [00:54:43] Speaker D: Yes, she is. [00:54:48] Speaker C: All it was was the same thing as somebody telling me, hey, I date multiple people. [00:54:52] Speaker E: Right? That's exactly what I'm saying. [00:54:56] Speaker D: It's not the same point, but I'm not. Okay. [00:54:58] Speaker C: Because a person telling how they date. [00:55:00] Speaker D: Hold on a second. [00:55:01] Speaker C: How she dated. [00:55:02] Speaker D: Hold on a second. [00:55:02] Speaker B: Yusam, she made a requirement for you to adjust yourself in order to date her, okay? [00:55:08] Speaker E: So what's wrong with having a requirement to somebody to date you? You know what I'm saying? Whether it's me and you know that I'm dating multiple people and you're coming in and either you can make the choice for yourself whether you're still going to pursue me and be one of the people I'm dating or not, or whether I say to you, hey, I only date one person at a time and you get to choose for yourself. You know what I'm saying? She made the boundary. We don't know what his boundaries was. You know what I'm saying? He could have gave her something in return and she adjusted for it. [00:55:35] Speaker C: But to me, that boundary was not an egregious boundary. [00:55:39] Speaker E: For to me, I don't think it was for you. All that's where your boundary, it is. [00:55:45] Speaker B: Not so much as a boundary because I know it could be used to manipulate a situation to make sure I don't get hurt, make sure I get what I want. [00:55:52] Speaker E: Almost anything when you're talking about connecting with somebody can be used for manipulation. That's where trusting yourself, I can't even see the other person. Trusting yourself when something comes up that you know to remove yourself. Because if you move out of fear when you come out here dating, you ain't going to never get far with nobody at all. [00:56:10] Speaker D: That's a true statement. [00:56:11] Speaker B: But it is. [00:56:13] Speaker D: I think you all missed what we missed. [00:56:16] Speaker B: That's why I said I think it got too deep. [00:56:18] Speaker C: Something funny? [00:56:19] Speaker D: I'm not trying to be funny here. I'm not. But this is really what I mean. You heard me, but you didn't hear me first time. [00:56:27] Speaker E: Okay, let me hear you again. [00:56:28] Speaker D: You cannot listen and I'm going to tell you why. But let's listen. Nobody says it for like 22 seconds. Even if she told you she dates multiple people, that's none of your business. Even if she says, I only date one person at a time, that's none of your business. [00:56:46] Speaker E: So you're not sharing anything. [00:56:48] Speaker D: You're sharing everything. But this is how you share. You move the way you going to move. If you all going to sync together, it's going to work. Because if she wants you to be her only guy, she's going to make an adjustment. Force her to make a move off your moves, not off her words. [00:57:05] Speaker E: Okay. But I feel like both of those things can come together. It's not saying that you. [00:57:09] Speaker D: Not the way he got ghosted. So it didn't work. [00:57:11] Speaker E: Well, that was a different situation. [00:57:14] Speaker D: It didn't work. [00:57:14] Speaker C: And I get what you're saying. [00:57:16] Speaker D: Women don't want to tell you how to date them, even though they want to tell you how to date them. They don't want you to listen. They want to just talk. I want you to hear, be respectful of what I'm saying. But they don't want you to act off that because that still didn't get her. [00:57:30] Speaker E: Women, we are big months. [00:57:33] Speaker C: Okay, but let me say this, okay. [00:57:35] Speaker D: I'm going to answer your question. [00:57:37] Speaker C: I didn't tell her that I was only dating her. [00:57:40] Speaker D: I didn't. It doesn't matter what you said. [00:57:42] Speaker C: I didn't say anything. [00:57:47] Speaker D: You agreed to go with what she. [00:57:49] Speaker B: Said, but she didn't know that because. [00:57:51] Speaker E: He didn't tell her. [00:57:52] Speaker D: You don't have to tell a person. [00:57:53] Speaker B: You can show I know. By the way, if I call you and you answer your phone every single time I call you, I got you. If I know I have. [00:58:03] Speaker E: I get what you're saying. [00:58:04] Speaker B: Yeah, but even if you don't know. [00:58:05] Speaker C: For sure, I've answered the phone many times. [00:58:09] Speaker B: Listen, another woman can but can be around. But if I know every time I call you, you're going to answer. Every time I text, you're going to text. That's why when you didn't call her and she had to call you to say, hey, you didn't call me back, she was looking at that roof trying to set her team. She was trying to dictate how you were going to treat her. And then when you got to the point where you're like, hey, I'm really feeling you, I want this. It's like, whoa, but hold up, sir, it ain't that deep for me. [00:58:38] Speaker D: No. [00:58:40] Speaker B: Not even say you was a good time. You were just a placeholder. You were something to do. [00:58:45] Speaker D: It could have been that. [00:58:46] Speaker C: It could have been that. I think we started with was, how did it go? What was the response? And I just went, but this is the thing. [00:58:58] Speaker D: Women not supposed to like you. [00:59:01] Speaker B: What? [00:59:01] Speaker D: It don't work when they like you too much. You know that when a woman suit. No second true. Just for a second true. Just make the men talk for 1 second. [00:59:09] Speaker E: I'm listening. [00:59:10] Speaker D: When a woman likes you too much, I'll be like, what? [00:59:13] Speaker C: Yeah. Something wrong? [00:59:15] Speaker D: She probably got civilized. Like what I'm telling you. [00:59:18] Speaker E: So basically what you accuse women of in the beginning, you all do the same thing. That's what I'm. [00:59:22] Speaker D: Women. A woman shouldn't listen to nothing about me. How to get me. I ain't never got me before. [00:59:26] Speaker E: All I'm saying is if she couldn't. [00:59:30] Speaker D: Finish, I'm going to eat it, too. [00:59:31] Speaker E: Your first thing was women don't like men who like them too much. So you're saying the same thing is true for you all? [00:59:36] Speaker D: Yeah. [00:59:36] Speaker E: Okay. Why is that? [00:59:40] Speaker D: Because there's a dance, there's a chase. I need you to give me some leeway. [00:59:46] Speaker E: Why? We can't walk side by side and get to know each other. [00:59:50] Speaker D: That's not how. [00:59:51] Speaker E: Take it out our own. [00:59:52] Speaker D: Okay, I'll tell you why. Women don't want to lead. They want to be heard. They want to be treated fairly. But no woman wants to be the head of the house. Not just wants to be the head of the house. [01:00:04] Speaker E: Not 100%, no. [01:00:05] Speaker D: Now she can control the house. She can run the house, she can have a voice. She controls money, everything. But if it's a bug, she wants her man to go kill that bug. She don't want to be in charge. [01:00:16] Speaker E: Spirit got it. [01:00:16] Speaker D: Okay, let's say spirit gets it. Let's say she got to get it. You just lost your girl. Too many of them. You're going to lose your girl. [01:00:25] Speaker C: She had to take the trash out. [01:00:26] Speaker E: Ain't nothing worse than seeing a man. [01:00:28] Speaker D: I wish I might catch my lady taking the trash out. I'll make her go get that trash and bring it back in the house. Don't you ever do that. [01:00:34] Speaker E: To get back to the theory. [01:00:36] Speaker D: That's how you lose control. You got to have a certain mind control, just like a woman has to have a certain control over her man. [01:00:41] Speaker E: So, CIA, you saying you never been on this side of the theory where either you've been some form of the Allen or Fraser? [01:00:48] Speaker D: Maybe I have and I didn't know. But early, before I became this attractive, okay, I had to work with the people who want to work with me. [01:00:55] Speaker E: And that's what I did, not work with them. [01:00:57] Speaker D: Yes, work with me. So I had to build up my comms to get to the point where, hey, you are five. I'm past that now. I'm tall. [01:01:04] Speaker E: Oh, my God. [01:01:07] Speaker D: I'm just telling you, like, early, you better date who like you so you can understand, because men have to have. You have to get reps in with women, and that's conversating. That's just not sex. That's conversating. Taking them on dates, treating them like somebody, figuring out what they like, you can't do that hanging out with your boys on a corner, so you got to sit and engage women. And some women who I probably wasn't as attracted to. Great people, some understand, okay, it ain't all about looks. So the woman who I thought was a ten, to me, that might not what I need. I might need an eight with personality. [01:01:45] Speaker E: So you're saying that you were the fraser, you were looking at the ten, you probably had an allen behind you, a woman that wanted you, but you looked at her and you was like you were five. [01:01:53] Speaker D: No, I worked with them fives until I knew better. Because what I always tell women, you. [01:01:59] Speaker E: Got to kiss through this theory. [01:02:03] Speaker D: You got to kiss some frogs to get to the prince. Maybe I was her frog till she got to her prince. So we mutually enjoyed each other while we both knew, grew and learned. [01:02:14] Speaker E: So we've all been there. So we all kind of graduated from some form of this theory. [01:02:18] Speaker D: I won. [01:02:19] Speaker E: In some way. [01:02:23] Speaker D: I'm good. [01:02:24] Speaker B: Yeah. [01:02:24] Speaker D: I guess that's the only win when you have someone. But women can't tell you. Men can't tell you. I have no idea. Tell you how. I tell you what I think. Men like, I could never tell you how to get a man. I had you spending all your money and all you had to do is come in, batch your eyes and like, man, buy a man a truck, get that man a truck. Get that man some jays. Get him some Roley. And he still leave. You come in here and whisper something. He ready to kill me. Like, what's going on? We don't know. We don't know. I'm just telling you we know what we don't know. [01:03:01] Speaker B: Yeah, we don't. [01:03:03] Speaker D: Some stuff I didn't even know I like. [01:03:05] Speaker E: I'm okay with not knowing some things. That's why you date, to explore what you do and don't. Like. We operate off of theories, but it's okay for you to come with something in mind about what you might want. [01:03:16] Speaker D: To tell me how to date, you know? [01:03:17] Speaker E: All right. [01:03:18] Speaker D: That's like a woman telling me how to get my. [01:03:20] Speaker B: I know what I want from that individual person. [01:03:21] Speaker D: Yeah. [01:03:22] Speaker B: I know what I wanted from the last person because I experienced them, but I haven't experienced this person here. So I can't necessarily say I know what I want from them, but I know what I would like. [01:03:32] Speaker E: Not necessarily from them, but I know what I want in a partner, regardless of what face they wear. [01:03:36] Speaker D: Well, I think that kind of goes in the general box because I think you want a good person, right? [01:03:41] Speaker E: Everybody wants to operate off of. We operate off of details, stuff that we want in general, stuff that we want when we're dating. It gets more detailed the more we know the person. [01:03:52] Speaker D: Be like, maybe not for guys, because if you attractive, that pretty much covers a lot of basics. [01:03:56] Speaker E: Maybe you all do. [01:03:58] Speaker D: We might not like you after some time, but to start off, she looked good to me. Yeah, just like you don't like men after time. After you get to know them half the time. Okay, she looked good enough to date, and then you go date her, and then you might find out she is a terrible person or she's an awesome. [01:04:16] Speaker E: Person, which is why you do the work in the beginning. And it shouldn't be a problem when somebody establishes. [01:04:21] Speaker D: You just can't tell them. You got to show them. You can't tell them. You can't tell them. I'll make all your dreams come true. You got to make them come true. [01:04:27] Speaker E: When you're doing all that, then no. But if you want to communicate what you're bringing, what you're offering and what you expect or what you want, I feel like that's okay. [01:04:35] Speaker D: That is great. Just take it with a grain of salt. Don't move off that. [01:04:39] Speaker E: And that's how we can agree. That's how we can. [01:04:41] Speaker D: Yeah, don't move off that. [01:04:42] Speaker E: Right. [01:04:42] Speaker D: Don't move off that. [01:04:43] Speaker E: Because they still have to show you. [01:04:44] Speaker D: She's like, all women have this thing. I don't know what it's called because I'm talking about men and women. I'm talking about men and women. [01:04:52] Speaker E: Go ahead. [01:04:53] Speaker D: Women have something that they don't necessarily like. I don't like to go out all the time. First thing you do is take her out because she's a liar. She loves to go out. [01:05:02] Speaker B: You've had a bad experience in that particular thing. [01:05:05] Speaker D: I'm not a material woman. Go get her something nice, bro. Don't do that. [01:05:08] Speaker E: She might be sentimental. [01:05:09] Speaker D: No, get her something nice. You can work on sentimental later. Get her something nice. Don't listen to. [01:05:14] Speaker E: Yeah. [01:05:14] Speaker B: Once you experience it with a person that you really like, it can change. [01:05:18] Speaker D: And my number one favorite, I'm a simple girl. [01:05:21] Speaker B: I don't like to go out all the time. Go out with the right person. [01:05:24] Speaker E: And sometimes it changes because the person changes. The situation changes. [01:05:30] Speaker D: Yeah. That'll get you there. That'll get you there. Okay. Back. Kay. Don't listen to the men. [01:05:44] Speaker E: Who said, I did? [01:05:46] Speaker D: You got to listen to them. You got to listen to them, but don't hear them. Hear them, but don't listen to them. Yeah. [01:05:54] Speaker B: I'm so happy I'm out the game now. [01:05:56] Speaker E: Why not? [01:05:57] Speaker D: Because a man will mislead you. Because he's thinking about what he wants, and he don't know that's not necessarily what he wants. That's not even what he needs. He just thinks that's what he wants. [01:06:05] Speaker E: I listen to what people say and I absorb what they show me. Right. So I'm doing both. [01:06:12] Speaker B: She says she's on the right path. [01:06:14] Speaker E: She got this balance. [01:06:16] Speaker D: Balance is not always necessary. Balance is overrated. [01:06:19] Speaker E: All right? [01:06:20] Speaker D: It is. It is overrated. [01:06:21] Speaker E: Sometimes you could be unbalanced, and it could be a good thing. But I feel like as long as your goal is to achieve some kind of okay, but equilibrium, you're not out here just being chaotic. [01:06:30] Speaker D: You're not. But every woman likes a little jealousy. Every man likes a little bit of crazy. Like. [01:06:40] Speaker E: Last round, today and I figured that out. Some toxic stuff. I'll be swearing. You all want some peace. [01:06:45] Speaker D: Oh, no. A little toxicity every now and then. [01:06:48] Speaker C: Is like, I'm out on that. [01:06:49] Speaker D: You know what? [01:06:50] Speaker E: Nothing to lean back. [01:06:52] Speaker D: No, he had a little too much. A little sprinkle of toxic. Yes. Grab you. Where are you going? Like, oh, Lord. [01:07:04] Speaker B: You didn't got grabbed up. [01:07:05] Speaker D: No, but that's a little bit. But he might have had she blocked from this house with a car. I'm like, oh, my God, that's too much situation. No, he didn't have that. [01:07:18] Speaker C: Really. [01:07:19] Speaker D: I'm just saying hypothetically. [01:07:21] Speaker C: But I have had some wild. [01:07:24] Speaker B: You've had crazy, like what? Give us an example. [01:07:31] Speaker C: Let's say I left one girl, okay. We broke up and I drove to the store, came back home, went to sleep, got up, went to like basketball practice, came back and I got a text that night. Yeah, I seen you at the grocery store buying such. And then you went to practice and you had this, that, and third on. And then you left out and then you went back home. Yeah. I'm making sure that you ain't messing with no other woman. [01:07:57] Speaker E: I was like, so she followed you everywhere? [01:08:00] Speaker C: Apparently because she messing. [01:08:04] Speaker E: I'm too busy. Look, if you cheating, I'm going to find out if it. [01:08:07] Speaker D: No, we weren't together anymore. [01:08:09] Speaker C: We weren't together anymore. So that's what I'm saying. You can miss me with the crazy. You can miss me with. I don't want to sprinkle none of that little spice. No, don't need it. [01:08:23] Speaker D: He's a panamanian baddie, you know. I don't know about none of that. I'm just on that note, I mean. [01:08:30] Speaker B: I've done some crazy stuff, so that's why I asked. [01:08:33] Speaker D: Well, we'll get back to Nick's crazy. [01:08:34] Speaker B: No, I left that life. [01:08:36] Speaker D: Oh, good. [01:08:37] Speaker B: I'm being a good girl. [01:08:40] Speaker E: Yes. [01:08:43] Speaker B: That's all you can do is laugh. [01:08:47] Speaker E: What? [01:08:48] Speaker C: Tell the people how they can find. [01:08:49] Speaker D: Yes, please tell the people. Please tell. [01:08:52] Speaker E: I'm not really on anything right now. Instagram, I think it's at K Antoinette, maybe. Okay, try it out. Type in case underscore maybe and I'll pop up probably. [01:09:04] Speaker D: Okay. Yes. You want to tell where you find me at? Yes, sir. Thank you for all the people who've been tuning into my live. It's been an overwhelming response. I've been elated at the results. I might get back into it some next month. [01:09:23] Speaker B: Okay. [01:09:24] Speaker D: But thank you for the hundreds of thousands and the people who've been there for. [01:09:29] Speaker C: We. Before we get yours, want to give a shout out to a couple of people? We got in our relationship status chat. We had Yari Venezuela hit us up. Are you guys on Vacay? Miss you all. Hope all is well. And then Charlene hit us up and said, can't wait for you guys to come back. Yolanda, of the very necessary podcast, she tapped in as well and said, hey, can't wait for you guys to come back. Please come back, Ming. Ming said, can't wait for you guys to get back on. Been missing the show. So for all you that we're back, Neek, tell the people how they can find you. [01:10:13] Speaker B: Well, thank you all for listening. It's been my pleasure. Until next time, it's your girl. [01:10:18] Speaker D: Nick Cruz, Cl butler. [01:10:22] Speaker C: And we are out. [01:10:43] Speaker B: Do another one. [01:10:45] Speaker D: We can do it pretty quick. Okay. Yeah, I think it's caught up on this chair. See, when you all connected it. I know what happened. [01:10:56] Speaker C: What happened? [01:10:57] Speaker D: I didn't put stuff back in properly. Yeah, that's what happened. [01:11:02] Speaker E: I know. [01:11:06] Speaker D: You know, Yk.

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