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[00:01:05] Speaker B: Welcome back to relationship status, Isha Girl.
[00:01:08] Speaker C: Nate Cruz, Cl Butler and your boy Yusuf in the building. Remember, you can find us on all podcast platforms. If you want to join the conversation, hit us up relstat
[email protected] and you can also find the show on relationshipstatuspodcast.com. We are here once again. We would like to. Our brother fatine is back with us once again.
[00:01:29] Speaker D: What's up?
[00:01:30] Speaker C: What's up? What's up?
[00:01:31] Speaker D: I got to start something.
I got to start something here again.
[00:01:35] Speaker C: What you starting?
[00:01:37] Speaker B: What happened?
[00:01:38] Speaker D: Your voice.
You got a cute, sexy voice.
[00:01:45] Speaker B: What's wrong with you?
The man that I like listen to the show.
[00:01:52] Speaker D: Well, my hair be okay, so let me give him that compliment. Okay, bro? Your beautiful lady has a cute, sexy voice and a good voice for podcasts and radio.
[00:02:05] Speaker E: Okay, I missed something here.
[00:02:06] Speaker B: Yeah, I did, too.
[00:02:07] Speaker E: Did I have my head down when you made the first statement? Because how did you automatically know he was talking to you?
[00:02:11] Speaker B: Because he looked at.
[00:02:12] Speaker E: He could have thought you sell boys for sex.
[00:02:14] Speaker C: No, he didn't.
[00:02:15] Speaker E: Okay, I know he wouldn't, but I didn't know if you just took that up for yourself.
[00:02:23] Speaker C: Okay, he did.
[00:02:25] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:02:26] Speaker C: It was direct.
[00:02:29] Speaker B: It was very direct.
[00:02:30] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:02:32] Speaker B: Nobody else in the room.
[00:02:34] Speaker C: All right, so first we're going to go ahead. We post a couple of times a week some questions on our social media. And the first question I want to tackle here in the reason for the season, okay. It was called the flashback Friday question. What was the worst gift a friend or significant other ever gave you for Christmas? For Christmas.
[00:02:57] Speaker B: Okay.
I can't remember what gift. I think it's like a perfume or something, but I could say the worst gift I've given.
[00:03:06] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:03:08] Speaker B: I gave a guy the same wallet every year for Christmas for like three years straight because I would forget.
[00:03:18] Speaker E: Okay, so you just went in the store and bought the same wallet over and over?
[00:03:22] Speaker B: Yeah, literally, I'll forget. Like, I was like, you know what? It probably didn't last.
I'll get another.
[00:03:30] Speaker E: That sucks, Nick.
[00:03:31] Speaker D: I know.
[00:03:31] Speaker B: Yeah, it really is. I got better. I got way better.
[00:03:36] Speaker C: What about yoursy?
[00:03:37] Speaker E: Just probably as a child, socks or something.
[00:03:40] Speaker B: What happened to the little CD? No, it was a book. That dollar.
[00:03:44] Speaker C: Oh, that was your birthday.
[00:03:45] Speaker E: Birthday?
[00:03:46] Speaker C: Teddy pentagrass.
[00:03:50] Speaker E: Right by the checkout.
99 cent book. Never asked you nothing about Teddy pentagrass in my life.
Y'all grown people co sign this foolishness. Look what he got me.
[00:04:02] Speaker D: Nothing.
[00:04:05] Speaker E: Well, yeah, I don't know. I don't think I really had too many bad Christmas presents. People say I'm hard to buy for, though.
[00:04:13] Speaker B: Like you are.
[00:04:14] Speaker C: No, I don't think so. Feels very straightforward.
[00:04:17] Speaker B: Yeah, it could be scary.
[00:04:19] Speaker C: Listen, gift card to Lowe's or Home Depot.
Go on Facebook marketplace. Find some tools.
That's his wheel. That's some Adidas gear. All of those things.
[00:04:34] Speaker E: Yeah, but those things all have plentiful. Yeah, so you'd have to go outside of that. Try to find me a gift, not see.
[00:04:42] Speaker B: You got to go outside of that.
[00:04:43] Speaker E: Yeah, but what we do is we only make a list. Well, I'll make a list.
[00:04:49] Speaker B: You still make Christmas a list for her to buy. Oh, for her?
[00:04:55] Speaker E: She thinks differently than me. So here's a guide. Things that you could do. Yeah.
[00:05:01] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:05:02] Speaker E: She still looks at it. A little flank like. This is what you want for Christmas? Because I really have things I need, and that's just easier for me.
[00:05:09] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:05:10] Speaker B: Yes.
My boyfriend, he likes the things I buy.
[00:05:15] Speaker E: It's three years.
[00:05:16] Speaker D: Two years.
[00:05:17] Speaker E: Don't put date on. Don't put date on.
[00:05:20] Speaker B: Isn't it two?
[00:05:21] Speaker E: Two.
[00:05:21] Speaker B: Okay.
He likes that I find things that he can really use but he wouldn't think of using.
[00:05:30] Speaker E: Okay.
Like a back scratcher.
[00:05:33] Speaker B: Yes. I bought him one.
[00:05:34] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:05:36] Speaker B: But, no. I bought him one of those can cooler yeti things that you could put your beers. And I bought him one of those. He was like, oh, my God, it's so cool. He is so happy about that.
Not this year, but okay.
[00:05:53] Speaker E: Yeah, that's a Christmas present.
[00:05:55] Speaker B: That was a Christmas present.
[00:05:56] Speaker E: Yeah. I'll probably give you that back.
[00:05:57] Speaker B: No, he was like, you both to.
[00:05:59] Speaker E: Buy this because you and Dick sporting good, you ain't posted.
[00:06:01] Speaker B: No. He was so excited. He was like, thank you so much.
[00:06:05] Speaker E: Wow. He's a cool.
[00:06:06] Speaker B: And he use it every day.
[00:06:07] Speaker C: What about you, brother? Patine. Worst gift you ever got.
[00:06:11] Speaker D: It's different times of my first one. The first one. But as I was older, somebody gave me an ugly, too big sweater.
[00:06:23] Speaker E: Okay?
[00:06:23] Speaker D: Too big.
[00:06:24] Speaker E: They weren't trying to be funny. Yeah.
[00:06:26] Speaker D: I don't know. It's just too big. It was ugly. And I was like, what are they doing with this? Getting out? Are they cleaning up their garage and stuff? That they gave me this. That's number one. And then I go back and I love my parents. And they're not deceased now, but they bought me my first pair of converse. But they were not really converse. They were called Coach Con. So Coach Con, not coach converse. They were called coach Converse. So I ran out like brand coach. No, that's the name of. They were. Right. Because they got them from the next door, from my house, right.
[00:07:01] Speaker E: Oh, wow.
[00:07:03] Speaker D: When I told my friends I got converse, I won the school. And they was like, those not converse. And they said, look at this and look at the bottom.
I came home, you're going to wear these.
And the last one was, this is when, again, when I was smaller. Electronic football game. So all of us had electronic football games. But no, my parents got to find the reject one.
So when my boys come over to play with.
[00:07:31] Speaker B: What is this here?
[00:07:32] Speaker D: Is that the one with the vibrating board vibrate?
[00:07:37] Speaker B: Why is your men so big?
[00:07:43] Speaker D: So I became the laughing stock. So my parents learned early. Look, we give him money, he goes shopping.
We can't buy for you because you, too. Because when I got my first.
What is it called? FX radio FM. No, it's a racing set.
[00:08:05] Speaker C: RC.
[00:08:06] Speaker D: No, but it's called something. It is called something. I had to buy that because they bought me one year before. And my boys come back with their cars like this.
I was a laughing stock man.
[00:08:25] Speaker E: It went to the big and tall toy store.
[00:08:30] Speaker C: I have two. I love my mother to death.
But my mother is the culprit for both of these. One, I don't like cologne. Like, don't get me cologne. And my mother, every year as an adult, sends me. Until this year. Till this year, my mother sends me some cologne that she got down on Delancy Street.
[00:08:57] Speaker E: Delancy street. You don't even know what's in the bottle.
[00:09:06] Speaker C: She says that. And that's her thing. I have so many things of cologne up there that are supposed to be brand name, that are not. And then as a kid, because my birthday is December 30. So for Christmas, I didn't know at the time we didn't have it. So she would give me an IOU.
And sometimes I would get the gift on my birthday, and sometimes I didn't.
[00:09:31] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:09:32] Speaker C: She write out, she would give me. It'd be a card. I would open the card and it'll be, I owe you. I love you, son.
And that's it.
[00:09:39] Speaker B: And you took that?
[00:09:41] Speaker C: Yes, but on my birthday, I was looking for stuff, and sometimes it did, sometimes it didn't.
[00:09:48] Speaker D: She was smart. I would have held one of the.
[00:09:50] Speaker C: Christmas gifts for your birthday and then from a significant other.
[00:09:56] Speaker E: Oh, God, don't do open.
[00:10:01] Speaker B: It would never feel.
[00:10:05] Speaker E: I feel like it's going to be kind of recent, too.
[00:10:07] Speaker C: No, this one ain't recent.
[00:10:08] Speaker E: Okay.
[00:10:09] Speaker C: It was a massage.
[00:10:11] Speaker B: You don't.
[00:10:13] Speaker C: When the person that's performing the massage can can. When they can. It's a great gift.
This lady could not.
[00:10:23] Speaker D: Oh, wow.
[00:10:23] Speaker C: And the thing was for a 30 minutes massage from her little cute thing people try to do. Oh, this is your ticket from the person?
[00:10:31] Speaker D: Yes, from my significant other.
[00:10:32] Speaker B: From your significant other.
[00:10:33] Speaker C: Not from an actual massage?
[00:10:36] Speaker E: No.
Out of her feelings.
[00:10:40] Speaker C: Here's a gift card for your 30 minutes massage. And it was on a card paper. She at least she got eliminated.
And whenever you want to use it, you could use it. So that night, needless to say, I was in complete and utter pain.
[00:10:54] Speaker A: Oh, wow.
[00:10:55] Speaker C: For 30 minutes, this was the worst.
[00:10:57] Speaker B: I wouldn't even went through that.
[00:10:58] Speaker E: The worst thing, I would have gave that back.
[00:11:00] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:11:01] Speaker C: The only thing that would have been harder. The only thing that would have been the equivalent would me kicking her in her back.
[00:11:06] Speaker B: No, it was horrible.
That wasn't even a thought out gift.
[00:11:12] Speaker C: That's why I say number one on all time worst list.
We had a lot of different ones, but the one that stood out to me most, as far as a comment, Adelina, she said alcohol. That was her worst gift that anyone's ever given her. We got shoes, clothes. That seems to be the.
[00:11:31] Speaker E: That's common.
[00:11:32] Speaker C: Well, those are the worst gifts because usually when people buy you stuff, sometimes they don't really take into account with paying attention to your style. They get you what they want to see you in.
[00:11:43] Speaker E: Don't talk about women like that.
[00:11:47] Speaker C: I was being direct.
[00:11:48] Speaker E: Yeah.
[00:11:51] Speaker C: Our next question.
Your significant other tells you they were close to possibly cheating, but thought of you and came home. What's the first thing you say to them?
[00:12:03] Speaker E: You all want to start?
[00:12:06] Speaker B: Go ahead.
[00:12:07] Speaker C: You first. I got to go with you first.
[00:12:08] Speaker E: She got to go.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: Yeah, I agree.
[00:12:11] Speaker E: Well, not for the reasons, we may not agree for the same reason.
[00:12:14] Speaker B: Okay, why?
[00:12:15] Speaker E: Because you thought that was okay to tell me?
[00:12:18] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:12:18] Speaker E: That's something you discussed with your girlfriend? That ain't your home, girl.
[00:12:21] Speaker B: Yeah. You feel like you think you're bringing.
[00:12:25] Speaker E: Me up to date on something. You're going to get some new dates.
[00:12:27] Speaker B: See, and we are on the same page with it.
[00:12:31] Speaker E: Don't be honest with me.
[00:12:33] Speaker B: Honest with me? Yeah, I'm okay with the lie.
[00:12:36] Speaker C: You okay with the lie?
[00:12:37] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:12:37] Speaker B: If you cheated, then lie to me.
[00:12:39] Speaker E: Don't think you come and confess to me.
[00:12:41] Speaker D: No.
[00:12:43] Speaker B: Just the fact.
[00:12:44] Speaker C: Person did not cheat.
[00:12:45] Speaker E: Why?
[00:12:45] Speaker C: You thought I almost cheated.
[00:12:46] Speaker B: But why would you come and tell me? Oh, I could have cheated on you.
[00:12:48] Speaker E: Yeah, why would you?
[00:12:49] Speaker B: But I didn't.
[00:12:50] Speaker E: What do you think you're doing?
[00:12:51] Speaker C: They want to be honest.
[00:12:53] Speaker E: Don't.
[00:12:53] Speaker B: No, you're not being honest.
[00:12:55] Speaker E: Sometimes lies good.
[00:12:57] Speaker B: Feed your ego. I could have cheated on you, but I didn't. Okay, you should have.
[00:13:01] Speaker C: No. What about you, brother?
[00:13:03] Speaker E: Especially a woman telling you that. Maybe a man can tell a woman that.
[00:13:07] Speaker B: No, he can't.
[00:13:08] Speaker D: Woman can't tell me that.
Since you put it that way. I know it was kind of phrased differently online, but no, you're right. You can't come home and tell me that, because I've had that told by my wife on something that she found out. And she found out. This is the most craziest thing that she said. She found out that I like someone, but she also found out.
Everybody get on me about this. I purchased a card for this young lady, and I wrote out what I was going to put in the card.
And I told my wife that I was going to the mall to get a gift for her and a gift for my friend, straight up friend. So I wrote it out in the car, but I was so tired, I came upstairs and I put in my pocket and I wrote in a letter, blah, blah, blah. My feelings developed, blah, blah, blah. But I know I can't act on them and we must remain friends.
Cool. But my wife found the letter.
Yeah. Because my goddaughter wanted a dollar that night for something. And my wife told her to go get it, and she said I was sleep, so she's, oh, just go in for teen pocket and get it. And my goddaughter was like, I'm not going in for teen's pocket. So my wife did, and she found the letter. And when I woke up that morning, 530, I woke up like this. I was like, okay. And I looked down, my pants is off. Okay. I look over there, and then I thought, the letter. So I go over there. I look over there, she looks sweet. I go over there, I check. I can't find it. Go in there and check. And she says, was it for this gift?
[00:14:57] Speaker B: Was that the gift?
[00:14:58] Speaker D: No, the card was in my car. The car. I wrote it out. What I was going to write in the car. I wrote it out in the car, but I was so tired to rewrite it. I said, oh, I'll write it in the morning because I'll see the young lady on the bus because she parked on my block and we took the bus together. So anyway, you were wiling. Anyway, so the first thing is I didn't get bs her and say, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know what I was doing. I said, I'm sorry I hurt you. You understand? Anyway, long story, I ain't going to say New Orleans. Long story is after we dealt with this, this is what she said, and this is what blew my mind because she was not the only female that told me this. She said, I would rather you have slept with her and moved on than have this woman on your head. I looked at her and said, oh, you're crazy. Well, let me just finish. I said to say, because I feel that if my woman likes a guy at the job, but don't cross that line, no touch, no this, that and the other that happens. We get attracted to people. But she wasn't the only one that told me that. She didn't know what. The only one that told me that was the woman on my job and a couple of other women. The point I'm getting to is later that week, I was sitting on the floor, she told me this. She said, we women want to know, but you got to know that we can't handle all the time the truth. So you got to know when and what to tell us. And I look back, she said, I'm just giving it to you straight. So that's why I agree with both of you all. Don't tell me it because I don't want to know.
[00:16:35] Speaker B: The story got crazier and crazier as it went.
[00:16:37] Speaker E: I got a question.
You did this with multiple women?
[00:16:42] Speaker C: No.
[00:16:43] Speaker E: Women told you?
[00:16:44] Speaker D: No. I said, my wife told me this, but other women, because you know what?
[00:16:49] Speaker E: Women were here.
[00:16:51] Speaker D: Because I said, my wife said so and so. And another woman looked at me, she said, I agree with her. I said, you agree with her? She said, yeah, because what happened is your heart and mind is caught up in this woman. And if you to tap it and kept moving in your mind and heart okay, you tapped it. It wasn't cool, but it's better than having your mind and heart caught up in another woman.
[00:17:09] Speaker E: That's a trick from women. But she is correct.
[00:17:12] Speaker C: That's what I trick.
[00:17:13] Speaker E: That's a trick because you're going to get in trouble either way.
[00:17:15] Speaker B: Yeah, you going to get.
[00:17:16] Speaker D: Oh, you're going to get in trouble either way.
[00:17:18] Speaker C: You're in trouble.
[00:17:19] Speaker B: We got some comments.
So you sat here and told her you were going to the store to purchase another woman.
[00:17:30] Speaker E: He says, friend.
[00:17:31] Speaker D: It was my friend. She knew this was my friend. She knew this was my friend.
[00:17:36] Speaker C: But she didn't know to the extent.
[00:17:37] Speaker B: Of you was expressing your feelings.
[00:17:41] Speaker D: I expressed my feelings.
[00:17:42] Speaker E: Only one person on this side of the room has the right to have friends.
[00:17:47] Speaker D: It ain't me because I expressed my feelings. But I also said that. I expressed my feelings, but I also said nothing can come out of this and we will have to remain friends, and that's it. And this woman never pushed up on me because she always said, I received the letter.
[00:18:05] Speaker B: You gave it to her. You were able to.
[00:18:06] Speaker D: No, my wife took the letter.
[00:18:08] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:18:09] Speaker D: He never got the card.
[00:18:10] Speaker E: You didn't rewrite the card.
[00:18:11] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:18:14] Speaker D: But she found out. So what happens is, when all this transpired, I went back to my wife. I didn't wait for her to tell me, you need to break it off with her. So I went back and said, you listen, I'll kill the friendship. I went to the young lady's house after a PTA meeting in New York. I went to her house and told her, this is what the young lady said. And she had tears in her. Said, she said, you're the only tear I'm going to tell you. I'm telling you the story.
Because bottom line is she said, I don't have many male friends that respect me. I have a lot of male friends who just want to, you know what she said?
Why? She had tears in eyes. She said, I did everything right because she said, I've been on the other end where I've been hurt. So she said, I did everything right. I've never did anything wrong. I've never came in your house without her being home, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. When I came back home, and this story, I tell the same all the time, when I came back home, I told my wife, I said, I went to so and so house and I broke it off. You know what my wife said?
[00:19:16] Speaker E: What's that?
[00:19:17] Speaker D: She said, I thought about it. Y'all can remain friends. I said, you what? She said, I thought about it, and y'all could remain friends. I called that other young lady on the phone, put on speaker. They had that conversation, but that was the second conversation because my wife went in my phone before I broke it off with that young lady and called her to see if my story died with her story. They talked because she knew her, but she didn't have a number, and they talked. And then when I found out, my wife told me, I called so and so. And I said, how'd you get a number? She said, I went in your phone. I didn't bring. I said, what did she say? She said, her story jives with your story. Because that's the truth, man. And things happen. It wasn't the best, but I'm giving you to the reality of it, and we remain friends. The problem is, this is the problem.
My wife was never okay with it, and she's not here now, but that always bothered her. And I found out that later because I'm only going on what she told me, but it really ate at her, and that really bothered her. And it came out towards the latter part of our relationship.
[00:20:29] Speaker E: The rule of thumb is just no women. No women friends.
[00:20:32] Speaker D: No, I ain't doing that, bro. That ain't going to happen.
That ain't happening.
[00:20:37] Speaker E: No. I want us to be clear on what you're saying. So you're not going to say you're not going to have women friends?
[00:20:42] Speaker D: Yeah, I'm going to have women friends.
[00:20:43] Speaker E: Do you think, bro?
[00:20:45] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:20:47] Speaker E: Okay, big man, you got it.
[00:20:49] Speaker C: We got a couple of comments.
[00:20:50] Speaker D: I didn't have that with all my women friends. That was just this one that I got caught up with.
[00:20:55] Speaker E: Hey, bro, you better be careful with that one.
[00:20:57] Speaker D: I hear you, bro.
[00:20:58] Speaker C: Kim Cannon from one of my favorite podcasts that don't come out anymore. Kim, we need y'all back. The Lennon Kim show, what is it? Anything and nothing with Len and Kim. We'd love to have you ladies have. You should have, because you now need to get going.
The fact that the person was even in that situation is the first problem I wasn't thought about on the way. Getting out the car, walking into the situation. Nah, they can have that. My trust is gone, but thanks for the honesty anyway, after the fact.
[00:21:31] Speaker E: Okay, I have a question for you, real short.
You and this woman were friends.
You and this woman were friends, but you all weren't really friends because your intentions weren't pure.
[00:21:48] Speaker B: And she crying because it could have happened.
[00:21:53] Speaker E: It could have happened.
[00:21:54] Speaker D: I told you from her perspective, why she teared up my feelings, got involved there, bro.
[00:22:03] Speaker E: So you really wasn't her friend?
[00:22:05] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:22:05] Speaker D: What do you mean I wasn't her friend?
Wait a minute.
From my book, you can become attractive to someone, you can desire someone. The bottom line is, from my book, if you don't physically touch and none of that, then it is what it is. So that's how I look at it.
[00:22:29] Speaker B: Listen, me and my best friend, my best male friends, like, of over 20 years, if you was to ask him how does he feel about me, he'd be like, she cool? Is she pretty?
Neither one of them look at me like that.
They know I'm a pretty girl, you're a pretty girl. But they just don't look at me like that because it's just friendship. That's it.
[00:23:04] Speaker D: And I have a lot of friends that.
I have a lot of female friends that are attractive. I have a lot of female friends that are just downright bad. But for me, I don't look at them that way.
This one, my feelings develop and I look back at what caused that. What caused that? And I see that now, not making excuses, but there was a void.
And then there is slightly trauma. This is not excuses. There was slightly trauma that I'm dealing with that I never wanted to admit that. I got the world on my head. I got the world on me. I got my kids. I got my wife. When she's sick, she's in the hospital. The kids, mommy's going to make it out of the hospital. I got two jobs. So I have all this on me and not getting any support. So all of a sudden, here comes a young lady in my life that we spend a lot of time together. We travel to work, so on. So sometimes we go to the grocery store together.
[00:24:10] Speaker B: You was wiling.
[00:24:14] Speaker E: You just said it was like an innocent, like, bus ride.
[00:24:18] Speaker D: I'm just telling you what it was.
[00:24:20] Speaker B: I had intimate moments.
[00:24:22] Speaker D: Yeah, intimate moments. Going to the grocery store, going to the grocery store.
I'm going to grocery store. She going to grocery store.
[00:24:29] Speaker E: You all could go different times.
[00:24:36] Speaker D: Be honest with you.
But the reality is it did feel like dating two women. And then once my wife found out and then agreed to it, then I felt like I had that quote unquote monkey off my back. But nothing still, because my wife was like, oh, you can remain friends. Nothing changed. Nothing got worse or anything like that.
[00:25:02] Speaker E: But had you, let's say you didn't get caught and you had given that letter. And she says, I feel the same about you.
That's where the problem comes.
[00:25:14] Speaker D: She already let me know that she felt similar. Listen, she said she felt similar, but she was not going to cross that line.
[00:25:22] Speaker B: You were cheating. You were emotionally cheating.
[00:25:27] Speaker D: That's what she said. That's what I said earlier.
Yeah, exactly. There was a reason why.
[00:25:35] Speaker B: Yeah, you were cheating.
[00:25:37] Speaker D: And I wrote in London's response, I don't believe in. If you all want to say it's emotionally cheating, what is cheating if it's emotional cheating? I'm not going to sit here and argue with you all on that. But when we dealt with this letter here, I said, the bottom line is that woman did not cheat because she did not commit that act. Now, you all want to play with that whole thing about the mentally thing. A lot of us fantasize about sleeping with somebody.
[00:26:02] Speaker E: That's where it starts.
[00:26:03] Speaker B: Yeah, but see, you fantasize about it and you.
[00:26:07] Speaker D: Wait. I didn't say anything about fantasizing my feelings.
[00:26:11] Speaker E: What kind of feelings? What you did with your feelings.
[00:26:13] Speaker D: Feelings. I really enjoyed being around this next.
[00:26:17] Speaker E: Step, just the next progression.
[00:26:18] Speaker D: But I didn't go to that next step.
[00:26:20] Speaker B: But you're in process of.
[00:26:24] Speaker D: I'm on the street, but bottom line is I didn't step off that curve. But you step off that curve.
[00:26:29] Speaker E: But you're not supposed to turn on cheating street.
[00:26:34] Speaker D: But sometimes your feelings that happen, will you pretreat it?
[00:26:37] Speaker E: Not to me? I don't have to be there.
[00:26:47] Speaker B: We ain't friends.
[00:26:48] Speaker E: If they cash in, know my name. We're not coming through this line no more.
I don't need this.
[00:26:55] Speaker B: I'll be on the phone.
I see you all the time, like, hey, welcome back.
[00:27:03] Speaker D: And people will tell you how alpha team moves. A lot of us can't move like that.
[00:27:07] Speaker E: Listen, man, that's all to it. Glory be.
[00:27:09] Speaker B: Not a lot of us.
[00:27:12] Speaker D: It ain't none of none of us. It's just that a lot of people do this behind your back. And you don't know.
[00:27:17] Speaker B: Like you said, my back or in my face doesn't make it right.
[00:27:20] Speaker D: It doesn't say it doesn't make it right. But a lot of y'all say, irene gonna do this. But a lot of times if people could be honest with you. See, that's why I was reading this book by Michael Basin. It's a new book. He's about lying. We lie to you and we're really lying to ourselves because we tell you what you want to hear instead of being honest with you. So we lying to you and we're lying to ourselves.
[00:27:40] Speaker B: You don't tell me what I want to hear. You tell me what you want to tell me because I don't know what I want to hear if I don't know what's going on.
[00:27:46] Speaker D: Some people know what not to tell.
I hate to use him because he's your significant other, but if you was in a relationship with somebody else, not your significant other, and he goes to lunch three times a week with somebody at the job and he know if I tell you, you're going to be upset.
[00:28:03] Speaker E: A lady.
[00:28:03] Speaker D: Yeah, lady. He ain't going to tell you.
He may be wiling, but he's doing it. That's what I'm trying to tell you. That communication is so important. But like you said, you don't want to know.
[00:28:17] Speaker B: Communicates that to me or not.
It's still not right that he's doing it. So if he's going to lie to me about it, he's not telling me what I want.
[00:28:26] Speaker D: Okay, so let me just say this.
Let me just say this, and I'm going to just say this. I'm in the entertainment world. I go out to lunch with people. And that's how it is. And I'm just telling you what it is. This is what I do.
[00:28:42] Speaker E: Having a business lunch is different.
[00:28:45] Speaker D: Right.
[00:28:48] Speaker E: Entertainment. You are representing something or someone.
[00:28:50] Speaker D: Right.
[00:28:51] Speaker E: So if you all two entities require to meet and you have lunch.
[00:28:54] Speaker D: Right.
[00:28:54] Speaker E: I think that's okay. Right.
[00:28:56] Speaker D: But if I'm at the job and so. And so.
Yeah.
[00:29:00] Speaker B: Well, not regular, just over and over.
[00:29:04] Speaker C: No, he was saying that if it's.
[00:29:08] Speaker E: A business lunch or business.
[00:29:13] Speaker B: Even just sometimes with your coworker. But if you're going to. I don't hang out with women with the same coworker.
[00:29:20] Speaker E: Whether I got a girlfriend or not, I don't hang out with the women. We ain't doing nothing. I'm not hanging out with you.
[00:29:25] Speaker B: Yeah, they ain't business.
[00:29:26] Speaker E: I got enough aunts and cousins and enough don't know about women.
[00:29:30] Speaker D: You see what I put on Facebook? So you know how I roll. That's me.
[00:29:37] Speaker E: With somebody else. And I've learned a little more. We. Yeah.
[00:29:41] Speaker D: And I've learned about that. Every woman you get with. See, this is another problem about men having self control. A lot of men and a lot of men will probably agree with you. A lot of men. For me, I know that I can't sleep with every woman I deal with and know that. Am I looking to. I like companionship and I don't like always hanging out with men. I like companionship and that's how it is.
[00:30:05] Speaker B: Get a dog.
[00:30:06] Speaker D: I wish I would.
[00:30:08] Speaker E: Are you in a relationship?
No. I'm not asking you personally, but are you talking about a person in a relationship? Because if you're single, you can do whatever you want.
[00:30:17] Speaker D: Exactly.
[00:30:17] Speaker E: Yeah, but if you have a girlfriend or fiance or wife, you're looking for companionship.
[00:30:24] Speaker D: No, I'm not looking for companionship when you're in a relationship, but what I'm.
[00:30:30] Speaker E: Saying if you're single, it doesn't matter.
[00:30:31] Speaker D: What I'm saying in a relationship. I have friends that were my friend. The one that I told you went over and got caught HIV Aid, that was my friend first. When I met my wife. Yes, the woman, she died. She was my friend first.
When me and my wife got together, I introduced them. They became friends. So now when the young lady would call, she called the house and speak to my wife. And then all of a sudden, oh, so and so want to talk to you. Hey, how are you doing? Blah, blah, blah, so and so and so. But that's how it was. I had female friends that I just didn't cut off, bro. That I was not intimate or with. You understand what I'm saying? They were my friends. I'm not cutting them off.
She had male friends that she didn't have to cut off.
[00:31:19] Speaker B: But we're not saying that you have to cut off your female. Well, I'm not saying you have to cut off your.
[00:31:23] Speaker E: Over here.
We ain't doing that.
[00:31:33] Speaker B: I don't wear it because my boyfriend grew up from ye high with one of my brothers, so they know each other. They're not friends, but he knows who he is, so there's no issue there. But I also don't cross lines of boundaries with those individuals. He could trust me. Even when I come here, I'm on a podcast with two men.
He doesn't mind it because he knows it's not going to be anything like, we ain't going out to lunch three times a week.
[00:32:02] Speaker E: No, we're not miscellaneously hanging out. We're not going to walmart after this.
[00:32:06] Speaker B: Yeah, we're not like, oh, I got to go to target. Oh, I'm going to come with you. Yeah, no, that ain't happening.
[00:32:12] Speaker E: That's not happening.
[00:32:13] Speaker D: That's why people tell me I should write a book.
[00:32:16] Speaker E: And I find it disrespectful if I spend all this time with this woman and you don't like me. I got a problem with that.
[00:32:25] Speaker D: What do you mean?
[00:32:27] Speaker E: Like you said, you all did all this stuff together. She supposed to be writing me that letter. I ain't supposed to be writing you in Atlanta. You supposed to like me.
[00:32:33] Speaker B: She said she had feelings for him, too.
[00:32:35] Speaker E: Nah, you supposed to write that down so I know how to move accordingly after this.
[00:32:41] Speaker B: That's why y'all were having those intimate moments, because y'all have feelings. Those didn't happen. If you all were just genuinely friends, you all would have just met each other, maybe crossing by, passing by in the grocery store, but not. Oh, yeah, we're going to go together.
[00:32:56] Speaker E: And you all walked together to the grocery store. He was in the city.
He was in the city.
[00:33:00] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:33:01] Speaker E: Drove in the car together.
[00:33:02] Speaker B: No, they were on the bus together.
[00:33:03] Speaker D: Yeah, we rode the bus together.
[00:33:05] Speaker E: And then you all walked around the store together.
[00:33:07] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:33:08] Speaker B: With the same buggy.
[00:33:09] Speaker D: No.
[00:33:12] Speaker C: Brother Fatima, once again, it is always a pleasure having you on the show.
[00:33:23] Speaker D: We ain't even start the show yet.
[00:33:26] Speaker C: We good.
[00:33:29] Speaker B: You'll be wiling.
[00:33:32] Speaker C: No, next episode. You got to be back because we got a bunch of stuff here that we did not get to cover in 30 minutes.
Tell the people once again how they could find you.
[00:33:40] Speaker D: Brother fatigue on Facebook. B-R-O. No space. Fatine. F-A-T-I-Y-N on Instagram, Fatine, Fatiyn. And the numbers 25.
[00:33:53] Speaker C: All right, don't forget to follow us on all social media platforms at Relstat podcast. Go ahead on Facebook, join the advice group. We also have now have a Facebook messenger chat. Go ahead and join that and make sure that you go ahead, follow and like the page relationship status podcast. Guys, until the next time, y'all, we out.
